Everyone wants their next food creation to be the next cronut or next ramen burger, anything but the next cupcake, because that’s how you go bankrupt. Of course, what’s the magic formula to making a food that people take Instagrams of themselves waiting on the line, buying the thing, eating the thing and throwing up because they are too many of the thing? No one quite knows, but dispenser of cupcakes and love advice Allison Robicelli is openly declaring her intention to make an Instagram-worthy, line-causing ridiculous food product at her Bay Ridge bakery (9009 5th Avenue), as part of Robicelli’s Jump the Shark Summer. This is so crazy it just might work.
Robicelli laid out her plan with a Tumblr post, with which she vented a little spleen about ridiculous Frankenfood is apparently more Instagram-worthy than just damn good pies, cakes and cookies. So, giving in to the peanut gallery asking her when Robicelli’s would have the next big thing in dessert, she’s declaring her intention to jump the shark, with an infinite number of ridiculous desserts this summer:
That’s right foodies, and the significant others who grudgingly get dragged along with them! We are dedicating every weekend this summer to getting even MORE intense. There will be no “wow, this cake is really delicious exactly how it is!” Oh HELL no! Why settle for just plain ol’cake, when we can hybridize it with a whole bunch of things. Maybe with make the cake with duck fat, stuff it inside a doughnut, deep fry the f*** out of it, then coat it in some sort of bacon Sriracha and locally-foraged mango glaze, or some equally intense stuff. Then you put it online with the caption “WANT OMFG (drool) (dead)”.
So, the plan is to make something called a vafflecake (a pile of Norwegian waffles, Norwegian waffles, with sour cream custard, covered with burnt sugar, and sold by the slice), push it on social media with the hashtag #waffpocolypse, and then stop selling it after the weekend because it’s SO over. Then it’s on to the next ridiculous dessert item, and on and on until the end of the summer until they “have a veritable menu of exxxxtreme desserts for the bookers at Good Morning America to choose from.” Will making of fun people while selling them ridiculous food work? Frankly if anyone can pull this off, we think Robicelli’s can, so forget the rest of that bullshit food this summer and head to Bay Ridge to jump the shark.
Or just get a regular cupcake there.