The 11 best ways to celebrate July 4th in Brooklyn

She wants you! Ok, maybe she doesn't, but you should still go.

She wants you! Ok, maybe she doesn’t, but you should still go see Wassbasco on July 4th for some sexy freedom. Image via Facebook

Independence Day is almost here. It’s that special time of year where we get to celebrate all things Americana, like BBQ, things that  go boom, Instagram and gay marriage. We’re sure you have your 4th of July outfit ready (which has at least one item covered in stars and stripes), but what’s this? The 4th of July Brooklyn rooftop party you were expecting suddenly got cancelled? What is a patriot to do now that their plans of watching enough explosions to give Michael Bay a full on orgasm have been dashed? Fear not fellow American citizen, because we have for you, a listing of parties happening in Brooklyn that will have you celebrating this glorious country the way our forefathers always intended us to; drunk, filled with red meat and listening to great American icons like Katy Perry blasting off someone’s weak stereo system. 

Wassabasco Presents: America F*ck Yeah 5
The Bell House, 8pm, $20

If you really want to celebrate the freedom of being an American, then you should probably head to the Bell House, where you won’t be fireworks, but women in skimpy clothing. Wassabasco, a burlesque performance group will celebrate America in Gowanus by throwing their have their 5th America F*ck Yeah celebration. $20 bucks get in you the door to see naked people (not the ones you see on your laptop) perform tricks, sing and if you’re a lady, you can get in for free if you dress like the Queen of The Amazons, Wonder Woman.

Independence Day Sausage Party
The Diamond, 4pm-9pm, Free

The phrase“sausage party” doesn’t ring excitement most of the time. But when sausage party means $5 plates of bratwurst, potato and watermelon salad from 4-9pm, with vinyl playing all day, you’ll wonder who doesn’t love a sausage party? The Diamond in Greenpoint is your destination for what will more than likely be the only sausage party you’ll brag to your friends about.

Release the Merican Beast
Grand Victory, 10pm, Free

You could almost do no wrong by going to a bar called The Grand Victory. The name is about as American as you can get. The event being thrown there, Release the Merican Beast is also perhaps, the most American event you will find in Brooklyn. Donut eating and strongman contest will take place, American named drink specials will be available  and in true American patriotism, the bar has a giant American flag that will covers the entire ceiling. So you can dance under the stars and stripes all night long.

Independence Day & $2 Budweiser’s All Day
Videology, All Day, Free

Americans take great pride in knowing that we have defeated the Nazis, the British and even our own Southern brothers in combat. What America has also done is defeat aliens and by aliens, we means the ones that tried to kill Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum in Independence Day. Videology will be showing our great triumph over the extraterrestrials all day, while selling $2 Budweisers (the most American of beers).

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nathan's hot dog contest

It’s time. via Nathan’s

Nathan’s 4th of July Hot Dog Eating Contest
Coney Island, 10am-1pm

Countries around the world insult the U.S with being a country that gorges itself on food. They view it as an insult, we however, as Americans, take great pride in eating more than anyone else. So to stick to the rest of the world, come watch an event that kind of sums up America: the Nathan’s 4th of July Hot Dog Eating Contest. Hot dogs will be consumed, stomachs will be stretched in ways that can’t possibly be healthy and hopefully you will either turn or completely gross out your vegetarian friends.

Country Brunchin’ screening of “Smokey & The Bandit”
Nitehawk Cinema, 11:30am, $16

Brunch is one of the great American pastimes, whether it originally came from America, doesn’t matter, because now that we do it, it’s an American institution. You wouldn’t think brunch would be something you would do on the 4th of July, because you do it every weekend anyway, but thanks to Nitehawk, you have a good reason. Nitehawk Cinema will be showing an All-American classic Smokey and The Bandit, with their 4th of July screening with some Bluegrass being performed by the Brooklyn Bluegrass Collective.

4th of July BBQ
Freddy’s, 3pm, Free

Freddy’s is one of the best bars in Brooklyn, no, scratch that, it’s one of the best in the whole country. Food all day long and great drink specials are enough to get us in the door, bur Freddy’s also delivers when it comes to BBQ. This 4th of July is no different, with the bar offering free food starting at 3pm (and beer on tap for $4 all day). What makes this different than every other BBQ happening in bars in Brooklyn, is that they encourage you to bring your food. So showoff your own culinary mastery of the BBQ and share with your fellow Americans. Some of us desperately need it.

Bushwick Pilsner Launch Party
Left Hand Path, 2pm-6pm, Free

To celebrate the release of their new beer, a Pilsner that is “based on the historic recipes of Brooklyn’s “Brewer’s Row” from the 1870’s to the 1970’s,” Bushwick brewing company Braven will be hosting a free BBQ inside Left Hand Path. Try what could be your new favorite beer, one that has some history to it, while enjoying the free burgers and hot dogs being served till 6pm.

SummerJam VII: Shea Stadium B-Sides
Shea Stadium, 5pm, $7

East Williamsburg’s music studio and performance space, Shea Stadium will be having a handful of local bands with awesome names such as Flagland, Laser Background and Cuddle Formation. The bands start playing at 8pm, but if you come early, you can get your hands on some free BBQ. You can RSVP for the event on Facebook.

Union Pool Summer Thunder
Union Pool, 2pm-6pm, Free

No one will judge you if you want to play Hulk Hogan’s “Real American” theme all 4th of July, however, you also can’t go wrong by celebrating America with some Latin Soul. As part of Union Pool’s Summer Thunder series of free concerts, you have the opportunity to listen to the King of Latin Soul Joe Baatan in Williamsburg, a few hours before going up to your friends rooftop to see the fireworks.

Threes Brewing Dover/Battersby BBQ
Threes Brewing, noon, Free

If you haven’t made it out to Threes Brewing yet, despite the fact that it’s an awesome brewpub from the folks behind Sycamore, this is about as good a reason to go as any. There’s a full barbecue menu (burgers, dogs, deviled eggs, watermelon salad and more) being served up by nearby faves Dover and Battersby, but you also get musical accompaniment with your meal from the likes of The Tumble and country trio Ivy, Beck and Neill.

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