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Too good to be true: Cyclones to hold ‘Fictitious Friday’ in honor of Manti Te’o

Your real-life imaginary boyfriend, Pat Kiernan, prepares for the game. via Pat's Papers
Your real-life imaginary boyfriend, Pat Kiernan, prepares for the game by Teoing. via Pat’s Papers

The story of Manti Te’o and his fake dead girlfriend is one of endless twists and endless delights. Did he know? Was he just a sucker? How did so many people not realize his girlfriend wasn’t real? Now, adding to the snickering surrounding the story, the Brooklyn Cyclones are holding their own Manti Te’o-themed night this summer, “Fictitious Friday” this summer, on June 21.

What will Fictitious Friday entail? Well, it’s kind of hard to know, which makes the promotion all the more genius. Every fan who buys a ticket for the game will be able to bring their imaginary girlfriend to the park with them, and they’ll have the opportunity to draw a picture of her to show their friends. Even better, every player on the video board will be a random picture of someone taken from the internet. Adjust your Facebook privacy settings accordingly.

But the Cyclones are also promising less likely things, like an appearance by famous Sports Illustrated April Fool’s gag Sidd Finch and a petting zoo with a unicorn, a mermaid and a Minotour. They also say they’ll have a version of the “throw a ping pong ball into a fish bowl” game where players can win a catfish instead of a goldfish, but given how big a catfish is, it might just be a stuffed one. Or you’ll be stuck with a huge, river-dwelling fish, who knows. Tickets to the game, against the hated Aberdeen IronBirds, will go on sale this Spring, unless they don’t, which would be fitting for the promotion. We’ll keep you updated on when the tickets go on sale, but for now we have to answer a DM from a girl who said we’re cute!

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