Brooklyn now has a luxury hotel for dogs. That’s where we’re at.

dog with monocle
The clientele this guy is going for, maybe? via Fuck Yeah Dementia

Dogs in Brooklyn have it pretty good, what with their many dog runs and public bathrooms on the street built specifically for them. We love dogs, so we think anyone doing nice things for them is great, but now there’s a “high-end” dog hotel in Downtown Brooklyn, and we don’t know. This might be pushing things just a bit.

The Brooklyn Paper spoke to Gabriel Vitol, the owner of Fido’s Retreat (not be confused or associated with Plato’s Retreat we hope), about what his $60/night luxury hotel for dogs offers to your best friend who you desperately need to keep from eating chicken bones on the street. The amenities at Fido’s Retreat include indoor fitness facilities, massages and bubble baths. And if your dog is too fancy to stay with the other, rabble dogs, you can even get him a $95 private suite. Of course, that’s provided your dog is found to be up to snuff after you fill out a five page questionnaire about her and she goes through an interview process to make sure she’s not a sociopath.

It all sounds like a bit much and maybe it is, but then we’ve never been faced with the prospect of having to leave a dog for a week and not having a dog sitter lined up. And obviously Park Slope’s monocle dog needs a place to stay, but do you really need your dog getting wrapped up in the complicated politics of luxury space and gentrification in Brooklyn? What’s next, Uber but for fetch?

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