Attend the prom and 11 other free things to do this week

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He’s not laughing at your dancing, he’s laughing with it

1. Test out some new material at Brooklyn Fireproof’s open mic. If you’re looking to test out new materiel, you should probably try Brooklyn Constantly on Fire (Monday)

2. What does the future of 3D printing hold, other than terrifying bands of 2nd Amendment nuts printing their own nuclear weapons? Find out, with input from MakerBot, Shapeways and more, at at Brooklyn Law School (Monday)

3. Nitehawk Cinemas’s Simpsons Club is learning biblical lessons and reuniting with long-lost family members this week (Monday)

4. Head to the Slurring Bee, if your ability to put words in front of each other in in the correct order is the last of your faculties to leave you when you’re drunk (Tuesday)

5. Brooklyn literary hero Jonathan Lethem hangs and chats at Greenlight Books. Hopefully more about Girl in Landscape and less about Fortress of Solitude (Wednesday)

6. Relive the four second sex and ritual humiliation of your prom at Bedford Hill. At least there’s a Kevin Bacon dance contest and you won’t get in trouble for drinking this time (Wednesday)

7. A comedy show promising to be a spring break you’ll always regret. If it’s worse than the spring break when we threw up all night while our friend had sex with two girls in the other room, it’ll be quite an accomplishment (Wednesday)

8. Celebrate Grand Central’s 100th birthday without actually having to visit Manhattan (Thursday)

9. Dale Radio records a live podcast at Film Biz Recycling, with funnywoman Ilana Glazer (Thursday)

10. You get not one, but two chances to see The Awl’s Dave Bry make public apologies: Thursday, along with Rose Schaap on Steamboat at Greenlight, and Friday at Book Court (Thursday and Friday)

11. The Blues Brothers, we all know, were on a mission from God. Kylie Minogue has never made her mission or allegiances that clear, so maybe Videology’s event featuring Jake, Elwood and Kylie will shed some light on them (Friday)

12. Learn what the life of a high-profile fashion photographer is like, according to Marc Baptiste. He’d know, because he is one (Friday)

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