Our god is a funky god

1. Eat your way to a rebuilt Coney Island (Monday)

2. What better way to make Christmas Eve a religious experience than to spend it with the Reverend Vince Anderson? (Monday)

3. Volunteer after eating the Christmas…ham? Goose? Help us out here, what do the goyim eat on Christmas? (Tuesday)

4. Get a head start on your New Year’s Resolution to be a 25-year-old grandma get good at needlepoint (Wednesday) (more…)

Happy holidays from Team Ho-Ho-Hokelyn at the No Office Holiday Party.

If you didn’t wake up this morning praying that the Mayan apocalypse would save you from a jingling bell of a hangover, then you must not have been at last night’s No Office Holiday Party with us at Littlefield. But for those of you that were there, we have a special thank you present: the gorgeous, festive photos from the Bibi Booth are here! Sloppy wet reindeer kisses to all who jammed with us last night; the party is meant to give all of us –whether you’re freelance, an unemployed or *gasp* an office worker — a chance to kick back together before the holidays. A full list of thank yous follows, the first of which is our co-hosts the skint, Brooklyn Based and Fucked in Park Slope, who are all attractive party people. (more…)

Get it bumping at Fort Greene’s “Make Music” parade

Aah, the holidays. A special time of year when we seem to collectively clamour for the title of “Most Destitute: 2013.” Winners are to be announced the first week of January at a special ceremony in your local bodega when your friendly clerk tells you that you cannot charge a quart of milk to your card “for some reason.” Chances are that right now, you have presents to buy (although hopefully you’re nearly finished), parties to attend, and family to see. Or maybe you’re staying in the city over the holidays for the first time either by choice or financial constraint. It’s a wallet-crushing time of year but fear not, there are still many things to see and ways to enjoy yourself this week that won’t add (much) to your impending financial woes. (more…)

If you’ve been procrastinating on your holiday shopping, don’t you worry, we’re here for you. While most of Brooklyn’s wonderful craft markets have packed up, to hibernate until next year, there’ still a few that can provide you with all the hand-made, locally sourced holiday cheer that you can handle. All markets open Saturday and Sunday unless otherwise noted.

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Gellete dreams big: get this girl some Ugg boots!

Get ready to tear up. Brooklyn’s Catholic Charities is collecting Christmas gifts for school kids in Red Hook affected by Hurricane Sandy. Here are some of the letters from 13 children. They’re asking for things like some kids are asking for Uggs and Hello Kitty merch, but some are asking for skinny jeans and paint sets, so we have some future Williamsburg residents in the mix obviously.

If you’d like to help out this holiday season, info is after the jump.

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He doesn’t care if you’ve been naughty or nice, just that you’ve been smashing the state

1. Check out a punk rock holiday benefit show at the Trash Bar. It benefits punk rock people like drug users and sex workers. (Friday)

2. Head to Videology to meet the Feebles. They sound friendly, but the Feebles are actually puppets on drugs. (Friday)

3. Go folk yourself. By which we mean enjoy a lovely evening of folk music. What did you think we were talking about? (Friday)

4. Nothing says Christmas like fuzzed-out, wailing rock music. Wait, we’re sorry. Nothing says war on Christmas more than that. (Friday)  (more…)

Everyone loves an open bar, and most people at least like children, so if you combine a way to help kids with an open bar, you’re gonna have a well-liked event. So, bring a $20 toy to Red Star Bar (37 Greenpoint Avenue) tonight, or just $20 and you can help make a Sandy refugee’s Christmas AND enjoy free drinks. If you want to help even more, enter the raffle, which has prizes like Nets luxury box tickets, a private screening for two at Nitehawk and even a freaking cruise.

Tory Burch lunchbox, $19.99.

I know some of y’all are going to be like, what’s this Upper East Side looking thing doing on Brokelyn? OK so it’s not a WORD Bookstore tote, and about 95 percent of you won’t give a SHIT about this, but for the five percent who do, it’s essential public service on a par with no-insurance medical care or how to find an afforable lawyer or yay for free birth control! This classy little Tory Burch lunchbox is one of the 50 holiday gifts that drop in stores on Saturday (TOMORROW!) as part of the Target-Neiman Marcus holiday collabo. If you haven’t been keeping up with this, it’s where designers including Rodarte, Alice + Olivia, Skaist-Taylor, Phillip Crangi, Lela Rose, Marchesa, Marc Jacobs (don’t get too excited, he phoned it in) and yeah, Tory, came up with an exclusive line of limited edition gifts bowing at both stores. Here’s the whole freaking collection. And YES, I’m drinking that Kool-Ade, out of an Oscar De La Renta dog bowl in fact. Whether you order online or get behind me online at the Brooklyn Junction store at 8 a.m., there’s a limit of five items per customer. The Philip Crangi trinket box (#30) is for my mom, but you can have these Rag + Bone  shotglasses:  (more…)

You have to choose one because they’re both on Friday. via DeviantArt

1. Check out some magic-inspired art and drink free home-brew. Beats trying to do magic after drinking prison wine. (Friday)

2. There’s a new monthly comedy show called For Science! which, coincidentally, is the same reason we give people for why they should go home with us. (Friday)

3. Dance your ass off at MAGNUM, when it returns to Tandem. Just in case you were, you know, wondering where it went. (Friday)

4. Go to the Fort Greene holiday market so that you don’t have to Christmas shop at Target. Hell, you can probably get a handmade flatscreen TV there. (Saturday) (more…)

Get a new generation rocking. Or at least trying.

Brooklyn is big enough to incubate more child talent than just a single 8-year old DJ. But it also has pockets of poverty where the will to play is there, but not the means. So Give Kids Your Instruments, a Bed-Stuy group, has stepped up to get instruments into the hands of kids who want to play one don’t have the means to afford one. (more…)