11/27/15 11:46am

Trixie Little will be so hoop-y to see you (#12) (pic via Facebook)

1. If shopping’s your thing today, try the International Coalitition for African Fashion’s Black Friday Pop-Up Shop at MoCADA, with handmade clothing and accessories from 20+ designers. (Friday, FREE)

2. Or skip the shopping and bring the troops to Brooklyn Bowl’s Post-Thanksgiving Family Bowl, free from noon on. (Friday, FREE)

3. Or sleep all day and then venture out to Halyard’s for some laughs: Bitches Brew features Eli Sairs, Aparna Nacherla, Lance Weiss, Mike Leibovitz, and Sharron Paul. (Friday, FREE) (more…)

11/25/15 1:04pm
It's waiting for you, and it's free. via Facebook

It’s waiting for you, and it’s free. via Facebook

By Black Friday, the love and warmth you feel for your family might be worn down to a nub and you’ll feel the need to get out of the house. Or you’ll just feel really gluttonous and you need to get some energy out. You don’t want to go to the mall though, and Brooklyn Boulders’ offer of free climbing doesn’t jibe with your fear of heights. Fortunately for you, Crunch Gyms in Brooklyn and around the country are going to be open and free to use for anyone who wanders in looking to lift some weights or throw around some medicine balls. (more…)

11/25/15 9:56am
Be thankful this isn't your life

Be thankful this isn’t your life

Well, here it is, the final night in New York before Thanksgiving. Things are a little sleepy out there, what with people freeing their employees to either go back to their faraway homes or just drink in their nearby homes with friends. If you don’t want to do either of those though, the Brokelyn Events Calendar is here for you, as usual, with some cool stuff to do. Just one more thing to be thankful for. (more…)

11/25/15 9:21am
Sound the horns and ax out your date: the No Office Holiday Party is coming soon! Photo by BibiBooth.

Sound the horns and ax out your date: the No Office Holiday Party is coming soon! Photo by BibiBooth.

Some holiday traditions are better than others. For every marathon of Bob’s Burgers Christmas episodes there’s a marathon of blowhards taking issue with what whether there is enough Jesus spice latte in their chain coffee. For every drunken ugly sweater party, there’s a stuffy office party where you can’t quite get totally turnt lest your name get turnt over to HR on Monday. This is why the No Office Holiday Party is our new favorite holiday tradition, with all the celebration of an end-of-year fete, even if you don’t have an office you go to or don’t even get out of your pajamas for your freelance job.

Brokelyn and our friends at the skint are proud to bring you the fifth No Office Holiday Party on Dec. 17 at Littlefield! It’s a five-year anniversary end-of-year-bonus edition, so we’ll have live band karaoke, our killer photo booth, holiday bling, all with special host Naomi Ekperigin (of Broad City and Difficult People). And tickets are still just $5 (buy them here now)! (more…)

11/24/15 2:36pm

Ah Black Friday, the one day per year (other than if your favorite sports team wins a championship) that rioting is not just accepted but is defended as being baked into the American tradition like so many caramelized apples in that pie you’re while eating on line for a cheap flat screen TV. Sure you could not participate in this, but missing the deals means no TV for you, so retailers kind of have you by the short and curlies. On the other hand, like this video purporting to show a kindly old man retailer being honest about the whole thing points out, you could just get cheaper stuff a few days later of by ordering online.

We’re going to refrain from going with the usual internet hyperbole about how this video “lays waste” or “destroys” Black Friday or whatever, because what’s the point? Sure well know the truth about it, and we’re told it time and time again. But no matter how many times it’s said, no matter how many goofy Tim and Eric-style product rebrandings a video will have, once the deals come, you’ll buy it. You’ll buy anything. (more…)

11/24/15 12:49pm

Too fresh. Almost.

Very Fresh is a Brooklyn based lo-fi/punk band that’s headed up by bassist Cindy Lou Gooden, formerly of Babement, the all-female (not like that matters) Pavement cover band. Very Fresh just released a new single on New Professor Records and it’s quite literally the perfect thing to listen to while you’re bustling around your apartment, doing whatever, enjoying the familiar/deadly smell of your space heater. It’s cold as shit outside. Listen to this and jump up and down a little. Jump on the bed for all anyone cares. You’re a grown ass person and you’re living your true life. (more…)

11/24/15 11:37am

Welcome to your doom. Photoshop by Madelyn Owens

Thanksgiving is the most American of holidays. It’s a day of overindulgence, football, casually racist uncles, loose fitting pants…and hours spent in gridlock traffic on our crumbling highway system. Maybe you have the income to book a flight or a train on the Biggest Most Expensive Travel Days of the year, but most likely you will be braving a budget bus trip back to your homeland.

The low price tag comes with hidden costs: there’s the chronic back pain from the cramped seats, or a seat mate who packed their own tuna salad, of course. Sometimes though, things are much worse. A fellow passenger who won’t stop singing, a chugging contest in the back of the bus and threats of violence. Even worse, sometime YOU’RE the problem. To help you through the long journey ahead, our Brokesters share their most harrowing tales of bus life struggles. (more…)

11/24/15 9:02am
Get a reminder of the power of the Dark Side

Get a reminder of the power of the Dark Side

The thing about a short week is that it makes the longing for the end of it that much more acute. Oh sure you think at first that having just three days to work will be easy, but then you see some people leaving two days into the week, and some people left yesterday. And you’re still here, stuck at your desk until sometime on Wednesday. Well, unlike those people who left, you can enjoy yourself in the greatest city in the world, thanks to the fun things to do on the Brokelyn Events Calendar. Those people who left early are all probably on overbooked flights with crying babies. (more…)

11/23/15 3:21pm
When regular police tape just won't do! via gilf!

When regular police tape just won’t do! via GILF

Gentrification is pretty much everywhere you look these days in Brooklyn, New York City and really any urban area, but you might feel it needs a better marker than a cupcake shop or a coffee shop or a characterless million dollar condo building or an influx of people trying not to be racist while they dance around the question of whether a neighborhood is safe.

If you feel that way, now you can put a big yellow marker on everywhere you think gentrification is happening, with this 1,000-foot roll of yellow caution tape that says “GENTRIFICATION IN PROGRESS.” Sure it’ll run you $60, but just think of how mad yuppies in their million dollar condos will be when they have to knock this down from the front door of their building every single morning until you run out of tape. (more…)

11/23/15 1:12pm
We're thankful for Jean Grae's amazing fashion sense (#3)

We’re thankful for Jean Grae’s amazing fashion sense (#3) (pic by Ochos Photography)

1. It’s Thanksgiving week, so start it off right by stuffing yourself at Sycamore Bar’s Friendsgiving, which promises turducken meatballs, mulled wine, and pie. Nommmm. (Monday, FREE)

2. Or if you prefer to start it off laughing, head to the Brooklyn Brewery, which has joined forces with Above Average to present an excellent comedy showcase, featuring Aparna Nancherla, Aaron Jackson, Jo Firestone, and Jon Rudnitsky. (Monday, FREE) (more…)