Let Biz Markie whisper in your ear, and 18 more ways to get what you need this week

Biz Markie, ready to be your friend. (#7)

1. Hear tales of international journalism from Roads & Kingdoms editor Mitch Moxley and correspondent Jen Percy, in support of Doctors Without Borders. (Monday, $10)

2. Laugh with Phoebe Robinson, Jacqueline Novak, Trish Nelson, and many more at the Side Ponytail Comedy Show—this month with free ice cream! (Monday, FREE)

3. Learn about diversity in books at the Akashic salon on reverse gentrification in the literary world. (Monday, FREE)

4. Put on your best sardonic expression and head to Animal Farm to hear satirical and critical writing from Randall Horton, Sheila McClear, Chelsea Summers (“the Shakespeare of ass-eating”), and more. (Tuesday, FREE)

5. Things are bound to get real weird at the 2nd annual Mx. Bushwick Burlesque Pageant. (Tuesday, $7+ suggested)

6. Adam Gopnik recently said, “When a bookstore closes, an argument ends,” so start some new arguments at the grand opening of Pioneer Books. (Tuesday, FREE)

7. Nobody beats the Biz—hear him at Herbert von King Park with Masta Ace. (Wednesday, FREE)

8. Everyone knows it’s what’s on the inside that counts, so cheer on the contestants in Jo Firestone’s 4th annual Inner Beauty Pageant. (Wednesday, $5)

9. Have a posh evening of outdoor opera with arias and duets by Metropolitan stars Janai Brugger, Nathan Gunn, and Isabel Leonard. (Wednesday, FREE)

10. Hear every voice lifted at the Bklyn Choral Sing-In, where all singers are welcome. (Wednesday, FREE)

11. Celebrate Brooklyn Museum Director Arnold Lehman with pop-up artist talks throughout the museum, plus dance performances and a steel-drum band. (Thursday, FREE)

12. The MTA thanks you for your patience during the Stuck Between Stations comedy show, featuring Nick Vatterott, Missy Baker, Carmen Lagala, and more. (Thursday, FREE)

13. Look backward and then forward at the history and future of telescopes at Astronomy on Tap. (Thursday, FREE)

14. Blast off at Grumpy Bert with the Lost in Space reading, featuring Erika Bartonlini, Chelsea Fonden, Wynne Kontos, and many more. (Thursday, FREE)

15. Try not to scream for Van Leeuwen as the company’s founders launch their new book Van Leeuwen Artisanal Ice Cream—there’ll be plenty of ice cream for everyone, of course. (Thursday, FREE)

16. Check out Late Night Basement, featuring Michael Shannon, Opus Moreschi, and Naomi Ekperigin, as they move to new digs in the Livestream building. (Friday, FREE)

17. Who says art needs to be in a gallery? Apostrophe is putting up a bunch on a subway platform, guerilla-style. (Friday, FREE)

18. Listen to a pre–Father’s Day reading, with Brian Gresko, Dani Shapiro, Rob Spillman, and Leigh Newman’s tales about fathers and fatherhood. (Friday, FREE)

19. Jam out to Brooklyn’s Bawlin’, a 12-hour dance party with a BBQ buffet. (Friday, $10)

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