Love locks, the physical manifestation of a James Blunt song, were already weighing down the Brooklyn Bridge and falling on cars. As if that wasn’t enough, according to the Brooklyn Paper, some motherfuckers who think they’re being cute have decided to start putting their undying proclamations of eternal love that will last forever and ever on the Manhattan Bridge.
So far, there haven’t been enough love locks places on the Manhattan Bridge to become a big cause of concern for the Department of Transportation, which is good. What’s less good is the fact that New York’s infrastructure is crumbling pretty well just through normal use. The last thing it needs is one goddamn Master Lock after the other telling us that “Bryce loves Jennifer” weighing down a 102-year-old bridge.
The Brooklyn Paper found people who compared this plague to “street art,” which is dead fucking wrong, since art takes actual effort and slapping a lock on a bridge does not. They also quoted on nonchalant observer as saying that people had “a right” to put up love locks. Sure, the Manhattan Bridge is a public place, but that doesn’t mean it “belongs” to every Donna and Geoffrey who decide they’re going to pollute it with their garbage $5 love pledge. We remind you, after all that “Your right to swing your arms ends just where the other man’s nose begins.” So knock it the fuck off.