You can get a Maine inn just by writing an essay

center lovell inn
All of this could be yours, for just $200 and a short essay. via

Getting away from it all: it’s the second-most popular “it all” dream to chase after “having it all,” but despite it’s high degree of difficulty, people are still really into trying to achieve it. If you’re sick of the rat fight and the big city and want a change of pace, you’ve got your chance, because the owner of a Maine inn is giving away the entire damn thing to whoever wins an essay contest she’s running. There’s something vaguely Shining-esque about the whole offer if you ask us, but if you wanna get away, this does sound like one of the better offers out there.

The Boston Globe reports that Center Lovell Inn owner Janice Sage is bowing out of the hospitality game, and seeing as how she got her hands on the inn by winning an essay contest, she’s passing it on the new owner the same exact way. If you want to get your hands on the 210-year-old, seven-room inn, all you’ve got to do is write a 200-word essay based on the prompt “Why I would like to own and operate a country inn,” and pay the contest’s $125 entry fee. It’s deceptively simple, so definitely stay up all night pulling your hair out over making the essay perfect.

The only other catch is that if you win the contest, you actually have to run the inn, for at least one year. Sage will give you $20,000 to start your exciting career in inn keeping, but after that it’s up to you. The job sounds really demanding, what with 17-hour days and having to deal with needy guests chirping about this and that like a bunch of needy baby birds, but maybe it’s not as hard as it sounds. Who are we to say that’s better than living in the greatest goddamn city on Earth? So, if that’s what you want, you can enter the contest here. Just remember that if you win, you owe us a 5% equity stake because we told you about this.

Correction: An earlier version of this story listed the entry price for the essay contest at $200 instead of $125. We regret nothing.

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