BK Top 5: The best things to do tonight, 12/9

Whether you love helping or drinking beer, this will have something for everyone

It’s Wednesday, it’s the middle of the week. That’s good news if you’re suffering through a terrible week you wish would just end already, but it’s bad news if lots of great stuff is happening to you and you’re afraid next week won’t be as fun. The yin and the yang, the good and the bad, it exists in all things. Except for, of course, the Brokelyn Events Calendar, which is all good. Why, just look at all this great stuff I found for you to do tonight.

FORENSIC PATHOLOGY: ALL ABOUT DEATH CERTIFICATES
DID YOU KNOW: not having a birth certificate can be find, but not having a death certificate can cause a shitload of problems? Find out how that can be in an illustrated lecture by forensic pathologist Jay Stahl-Herz, who’ll go over death certificates’ importance in legal and public health circles, as well as all the steps in the process of declaring someone legally dead. This is an extremely useful night out for someone planning on faking their death in the future.
8pm, Morbid Anatomy Museum, 424A 3rd Avenue, Gowanus, $8

RIVERHEAD HOLIDAY PARTY
Haven’t attended enough fancy charitable evenings this year? Well, you’re running out of time, better get on it. Start with tonight’s Riverhead Books holiday party, where $15 (which goes to Libraries Without Borders, a group that gives books to Syrian refugees) gets you all-you-can-drink beer at Brooklyn Brewery. Plus, you can mingle with authors while eating baked goods that they bring, attempt to win various raffle prizes AND hop in a photo booth with Man Booker Prize winner Marlon James. After all, you can never have enough goofy, drunken photos with award-winning authors up on the fridge.
8pm, Brooklyn Brewery, 79 North 11th Street, Williamsburg, $15

SO WHAT HAPPENED WAS – WE’RE AWESOME
‘Tis the season for humility, but too many people out there are trying to pretend like they don’t spend eleven and a half months per year being foolish and prideful. So, it’s nice to see storytelling night So What Happened Was devoting night to stories where the participants talk about what hot shit they are. After all, honesty is also important if you want Santa to bring you something nice.
7pm, Freddy’s, 627 5th Avenue, South Slope, FREE

DEVOUR HOUR
Free comedy is always great, but it’s always easier to dip in to a free show when there’s also free food to be had with the laughs. See the joke there is that at tonight’s show, there’ll be free hummus and salsa and other things you dip food in, to go along with the laughs from the likes of Megan Gailey, Frank Nelson and Julia Shiplett. You can be extra popular at this if you also bring some chips.
8pm, Hank’s Saloon, 46 3rd Avenue, Boerum Hill, FREE

BEER GEEK TRIVIA FEATURING EVIL TWIN BREWING
It’s that time of the month again. The time of the month where you burst into a bar and start yelling facts about beer and for once the bartender doesn’t have you removed for being a nuisance know-it-all. Well, maybe don’t yell stuff, instead calmly write you answers down, because yelling during the Beerded Ladies’ beer trivia is only going to help give answers to your opponents. Tonight’s sponsor, and provider of discounted drinks and swag, is Evil Twin Brewing, so you also may end up running into someone with your face except it’s also got a goatee. Just roll with it.
8pm, Glorietta Baldy, 502 Franklin Avenue, Bed-Stuy, FREE