We don’t care if you’ve been naughty or anything else—come party! (#8)

1. If you’re of the poetical sort—or longing to be—check out the Brooklyn Poets Yawp, a workshop and open mic in one. Come at 7 for the workshop with Bill Zavatsky, or show up at 8 and sign up to read. (Monday, $5)

2. The consistently fabulous Franklin Park Reading Series closes out the year with a bang, with readings from Chinelo Okparanta, Jamie Iredell, Ryan Britt, Niina Pollari, Annie Liontas, and Rachel Sherman. (Monday, FREE)

3. Want to tell the world about your adorable / insane / wonderful / horrible pet? Head to the Soda Bar for Show & Tale: Tails, Paws, Beaks & Claws, where you’ll get 3 minutes to share your best stories (and pictures!) of your puppy, kitty, cockatiel, or anything else. All proceeds go to Badass Animal Rescue. (Tuesday, $12.50)

4. See a cavalcade of seasonally relevant animations, sketches, and puppets at A Cartoon Monsoon Christmas, hosted by comedians Joe Rumrill and Mary Houlihan. (Tuesday, $8)

5. The latest installment in BRIC’s Stoop Series is a partnership with nonprofit caribBEING, showcasing art made by people of Caribbean descent, including short films, a Q&A with author Oneka LaBennett, and a performance by singer-songwriter Irka Mateo. (Wednesday, FREE)

6. We guess Brooklyn can be a pretty competitive place, from chili takedowns to storytelling competitions. But this is a new one: tonight the Diamond will host a Staring Contest: the first to blink loses, and audience heckling is encouraged. Good luck, y’all. (Wednesday, $3 to play)

7. If you’re looking to get a little twangy, hit the Bell House for the Sweetback Sisters Country Singalong Spectacular, with songbooks provided and audience participation expected. (Thursday, $10)

8. Or for something a little more secular—with a much higher chance of kissing a sexy lady Santa under the mistletoe—join us at the 5th annual No Office Holiday Party, presented by Brokelyn and the skint! In addition to the mistletoe, expect karaoke, a photobooth, cheap drinks, comedy, and plenty more. (Thursday, $5)

9. For some high-tech performance art, check out Bodies in Motion, a collaboration between Tisch School of the Arts and Tandon School of Engineering at Brooklyn Experimental Media Center. Expect live-motion capture dance, virtual-reality installations, and participatory performances. (Friday, FREE)

10. Or for something a little more risqué, try First Comes Love, where actors perform amateur adult film scripts live on stage. Hosted by comedian Kyle Ayers. (Friday, $8)

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