Two’s company, but three’s a crowd, unless it’s three people going together to Poughkeepsie, in which case you might need that third person to keep your ex-husband from shimmying down the chimney to get his Oxycontin.
Finally, someone is portraying the real millennial Brooklyn. The one that confronts their Oxycontin ex-husband in Poughkeepsie.
Allow me to explain. Marnie and Desi are still being so gross, and they decide to take a road trip to romantic Poughkeepsie for reasons that remain unclear. To help mask the charade, Hannah tags along. While squirreled away in their cabin, Marnie finds Desi’s mason jar full of Oxycontin, because — twist! — he’s been addicted to Oxy this whole time. Marnie, of course, does the entirely wrong thing, smashing his mason jar and stomping on his stash, turning Desi into a full-blown Marky Mark Fear monster, smashing windows and terrorizing Hannah and Marnie for a weird horror movie segment. The whole situation allows Hannah to drop some knowledge on Marnie: Maybe she didn’t realize her husband was pounding Oxy like they’re fucking Mentos because she’s too busy always thinking of her self. Mind blown. (more…)
If you live in New York, chances are you’re enjoying a comfortably blue news feed from your fellow voters this election day. Which is no surprise, since NY has long been about 99 percent for #Her in Five Thirty Eight‘s polls. If you do come across someone today who happened to vote for Trump or a third-party candidate, you should be kind; hard as it may be to “understand,” we’re all human, and we’re all trying. Besides, people already booed Trump at the polls today.
What’s more, we all have something fundamental in common: a love of New York City. And as the new election video above reminds us, a shared love of New York City comes with a shared hatred too, for the real Public Enemy No. 1. It’s not Trump supporters; it’s tourists. (more…)
Can you make the next great comedy that everyone says they love but no one seems to watch?
If you’re involved in a creative pursuit in New York, your mom or your grandpa is always telling you to just walk right into Mr. NBC’s office and tell him about your great idea for a TV show. “You’re so funny, they’ll have to listen to you,” your mom says. “Jesus ma, that’s not how it works,” you reply. Except NBC is desperate now and has put out a call for comedy pitches from any damn idiot on the internet. Guess you mom was right again, so maybe you should also go out with that nice girl whose parents she met at shul last week. (more…)
These are the kinds of folks you’ll be competing against, FYI. via Facebook
So you saw the chance to audition for the new Star Wars movies, but space nerd stuff isn’t really your thing. You’re more about the singing and the dancing and the puppets and the entertaining from the heart, not special effects. A, ah, what do you call it…oh! A theater nerd. Well it’s your lucky day theater nerds of New York, because America’s Got Talent is rolling into town this weekend to see if you in fact have the talent you claim to. Mostly, this is your big chance to be on TV! (more…)
We’ve been enjoying Brooklyn Nine-Nine here at Brokelyn HQ (well, some of us have), despite it not having that mich to do with Brooklyn. Aside from some artisanal food crimes, the show is more concerned with cops goofing off and solving crimes than it is with any kind of Brooklyn-specific cred, down to not ever mentioning what neighborhood the 99th is in. But one sharp-eyed fan of the show noticed a map hanging on the wall of the precinct that locates it exactly. And the lucky neighborhood appears to be Park Slope. (more…)
OK, they nailed the similarity to the campaign posters though
It was supposed to be the television event of the season for politics nerds and Weiner-watchers alike: Anthony Weiner’s zipper problems were finally getting the Law and Order treatment. The previews promised ridiculous sexting names, nude high school girls and a front-running mayoral candidate. And yet except for a couple of standout moments, the episode felt strangely flat. Could it be that Weiner’s wandering was always going to overshadow whatever fictional adaptations came out of it? (more…)
Look for this to be the new style in Williamsburg in a couple of weeks
What’s that you say? A new show set in Brooklyn that isn’t about being in your twenties and _____? Sounds promising, but is it for real? Brooklyn Nine-Nine, from Parks and Rec and The Office writers and producers Dan Goor and Michael Schur, is another workplace comedy. This time, though, it’s Brooklyn-style. Well, kind of Brooklyn-style, but who cares when you’ve got Andy Samberg to charm the pants off everybody, including himself? (more…)
Andy Samberg shows off the NYPD’s new fashion guidelines
TV shows set in Brooklyn have had a common thread running through them lately. They’re all about young broke girls who just want their pants back. And while that’s certainly a slice of in-the-moment Brooklyn, we have more to offer than that, so much more. Wacky cops for instance, who make robot noises and wear Speedos to the office. And now Andy Samberg is capturing that slice of life in his new Brooklyn-based docudrama workplace comedy, Brooklyn Nine-Nine. (more…)
We assume Alex Trebek is just as smug on the Internet as he is on TV (via Facebook)
For most of us brokesters, real television is a myth, existing only through (often filched) Netflix and Hulu accounts, and on free websites with a questionable number of pop-up ads and a lot of subtitles. And while those websites are great for binge-consuming Breaking Bad and maybe contracting a computer virus, sometimes it’s easy to miss the basic comfort of zoning out on a couch in front of Wheel of Fortune and the 6 o’clock news. But good news, folks: ABC’s going to start streaming their broadcast to cable subscribers online, and for the first six weeks, the service is free for everyone! (more…)
Their show could be your life. Or is it the other way around? Ugh, we give up
TV: teacher, mother, secret lover. Despite the fact that we don’t own one, we still try to keep up with what’s going on in the world of the pictocube. One thing we strenuously try to avoid though, is aping the characters on TV shows. This is mostly accomplished by watching shows with sociopath protagonists, like Archer, Mad Men and Breaking Bad. We’d argue that Girls should be on that list, since even at their most sympathetic, the characters on that show are still terrible. But, a lot like how dudes still want to be Don Draper despite the fact that he’s just awful, people in their 20s want to be, or think they are, Hannah Horvath. So of course someone advertised an open room in their apartment as being a scene straight out of Girls. (more…)