Report: New York is only the second-rattiest city in America

Suck it, Chicago! via Flickr user cdk

Suck it, Chicago! via Flickr user cdk

New York City’s rodent population has never been one to shy away from the spotlight. The rats that run this town will do anything for a headline, from carrying pizza down the subway steps to eating one another for sport.

But a new report — released by the popular pest control company, Orkin — that ranks the most rat-infested (or “rattiest”) cities in America has ignored our rats’ efforts to pervade the media. Their findings show that New York City isn’t the No. 1 rathole in America, after all.

You wanna know which city is? 

Chicago. Obviously, it’s Chicago.

In addition to Chi-town’s rising crime stats, the city has to contend with an increasing number of rats, Orkin finds, who don’t even perform interesting social media stunts! Probably they’re just too busy taking classes at Second City and hiding from circus cats.

Orkin’s findings were based on the number of rodent treatments it performed from Oct. 1, 2015  through Sept. 30, 2015. New York City came in 2nd behind the whisker-ridden Windy City, followed by Washington DC, Los Angeles and San Fransisco.

Of course, DC has always maintained notoriety for being overrun by rats… but they’re dealing in the human kind:

The GOP rat king is coming for New York after all. Illustration by Madelyn Owens.

The GOP rat king is coming for New York after all. Illustration by Madelyn Owens.