04/14/14 4:18pm
smallest penis in brooklyn pageant

Runner up Rip van Dinkle will be back, trying to claim the prize he almost grabbed last year. Photo by Mary Dorn

Last year, the world was taken by storm by the genius of the Smallest Penis in Brooklyn Pageant, a competition that determined which of Brooklyn’s less well-endowed gentleman had the personality and the pint-size pecker that would make them Brooklyn’s most famous cocksman. And because the only thing better than one pageant devoted to small penises is a second pageant devoted to small penises, the Smallest Penis in Brooklyn Pageant will be back for a second go-round at Kings County Bar on June 14 of this year. Hooray! (more…)

04/08/14 8:53am
tromadance

True, this COULD be just a normal scene in Bushwick. But in this instance, it’s TromaDance. via TromaDance

Well, Brooklyn, you stuck it to New Jersey AGAIN!  First you steal their mediocre-to-above-average NBA team. Now you’ll have a prized film festival cross state lines and thrill many a Brooklynite whose passions are steeped in independent film goodness, when the TromaDance Film Festival moves to Bushwick’s Paper Box (23 Meadow Street) for its 15th Anniversary in June. Thanks, Jersey…again! (more…)

04/02/14 4:32pm
bushwick retail

Can we opt-out? via Oh, great

Everyone’s always talking about how bad gentrification for a city’s original residents or people just looking to live somewhere affordable or for neighborhood character and cohesiveness. But no one ever considers the feelings of people who like gentrification. Like brokers getting rich as hell off of it. That must explain why one made some flyers inviting prospective renters of a site at 25-29 Thames Street with a call to “Join the gentrification” in Bushwick. (more…)

out in the streets

Hey, shorts. Remember those? via Facebook

So OK, it snowed on Opening Day and maybe you had to wear your winter coat to Citi Field. And also maybe summer seems so far away that it’s more of a cruel joke than a scientific guarantee that at some point the Earth’s Northern Hemisphere will be tilted towards the Sun. But summer will be here at some point, and now to go along with the recent good news about CHVRCHES playing for free at Northside, we get news that Brooklyn’s truly cheap summer festival, Out in the Streets, will be returning to the Onderdonk House for another year. (more…)

bushwick gentrification

On the other hand, renovation IS a job creating activity.

We mentioned a couple weeks ago that talk show LNNY was kicking off their new season with an episode devoted to gentrification, and if you didn’t get to actually go see the taping yourself, you can see it online here. Seeing as how the show is taped in Bushwick, host Justin Williams sent their roving man on the street Christian Polanco to talk to business owners and longtime residents of the neighborhood to get their thoughts on all the white people. (more…)

greene hill food co-op

What mysteries lie behind this door? Find out on Saturday via Facebook

If you’ve live in Brooklyn long enough, you’re bound to get curious about food co-ops. Are they really just mysterious hermit kingdoms with strange rituals regarding plastic bags, or are they places people actually shop for food? Usually the answer to this mystery is only available to food co-op members, but this Saturday, the Greene Hill Food Co-op in Bed-Stuy is opening their doors to just any schmuck off the street for a non-member shopping day. Plus, they’re also giving away trees, as that’s the hip thing to do these days. (more…)

03/18/14 2:10pm
goodbye blue monday

Here’s your chance to help this very strange place. via Flickr user Prehensile Eye

In our post about Goodbye Blue Monday’s probable closing, we suggested that they wouldn’t go the crowdfunding route because they already had to do that to buy a new air conditioning system. Well, it turns out we’re not very good prognosticators, because they’ve got a GoFundMe page up looking to raise the $7,000 they owe the city in fines. (more…)

03/14/14 12:26pm
goodbye blue monday

We’re not sure if it comes with the cat or not

Goodbye Blue Monday is primarily known for booking anyone, no matter how terrible they are, which is a noble effort, if not one that pays the bills. Or in this case, the fines from the city that the club has racked up, which total up to $7,000 according to the Brooklyn Paper. So because of that, the venue is looking for a new owner or they’re closing at the end of March. Will a Red Mango take its place, as the prophecy has foretold? (more…)

03/14/14 11:14am
bed-stuy

You walked around here? So much brave. via Flickr user Stylewalker

From the Commercial Observer comes an unfortunate musical reference and yet another “Bed-Stuy is the new Williamsburg” push. You always know you’re in for a bad ride with the author starts with a reference to Billy Joel singing about walking through Bed-Stuy alone in a song that’s 34 years old. It gets worse though:

But the Bedford-Stuyvesant neighborhood is quickly losing the rough-and-tumble reputation Mr. Joel alluded to, and is now considered a prime candidate as Brooklyn’s next up-and-coming real estate frontier [Emphasis added]

I’ve recently walked through “Bedford-Stuy” alone on numerous occasions.

FACTS: Billy Joel sucks, Bed-Stuy isn’t a “frontier,” this is exactly what Spike Lee meant when he talked about Christopher Columbus syndrome.