Scandal as 6 Rockaway beach lifeguards caught acting like lifeguards

rockaway beach
Total freaking anarchy. via Flickr user Shannon

Maybe it’s just because I grew up in a beach town, but if there’s one thing I don’t usually equate lifeguards with, it’s “sobriety and temperance.” Apparently New York City demands better of its Fun Police though, because it’s some kind of scandal that six Rockaway lifeguards got caught smoking weed on a rainy Fourth of July. We thought you were cool, de Blasio.

According to DNA Info, the lifeguards, who again were just acting like lifeguards do, were smoking weed in a car down by Seagirt Boulevard and Beach 10th Street when they got busted by the cops. Despite the fact that the lifeguards were on their lunch breaks and that one of them was a lousy teenager, who obviously is going to get stoned on her lunch break, two lifeguards already resigned and the Parks Department is investigating the rest of the circumstances of the arrest.

Hopefully they don’t dig too deep, because if not being stoned is suddenly a strict requirement of a job that involves hanging out on the beach all day, the city might as well make all of our beaches Fort Tilden, given the dearth of good candidates they’ll find.

One Response to

  1. Conal Darcy

    Yeah, but if some kid dies on a stoned guard’s watch, the city’s going to be hit with a massive lawsuit. I can get behind enforcing sobriety for this job.

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