Downtown Brooklyn cursed with ‘Next Midtown’ label

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Pretty much says it all. via Flickr user goodrob13

Good news, people who moved to Brooklyn because they didn’t want to bothered with the worst parts of Manhattan: despite your best efforts to escape it, Manhattan is coming to you. According to the Commercial Observer, the Sauron-like eye of New York’s real estate interests has gazed upon Downtown Brooklyn and determined it’s the next Midtown South. Aren’t you guys EXCITED?

Now, it doesn’t guarantee anything of course, but the survey of over 100 commercial real estate big shots (“machers,” as the Observer called them, in sticking with the holiday spirit) determined that Downtown Brooklyn is the next hotspot to have an office. Or, as delightfully, square-ishly put by a partner at Marks, Pareth & Shron, an accounting (nerdiest of all jobs) firm, “Many people already think it’s much ‘cooler’ to live in Brooklyn than Manhattan. It may soon be the ‘hot’ place to office.”

So, does this mean that the Barclays Center will soon be as trashy as Madison Square Garden? That punchy and grabby Elmos and Cookie Monsters will wander around in front of Borough Hall like it’s Times Square? That Habana Outpost, Pacific Standard and Hank’s will be all be filled with banking bros in salmon-colored shirts with popped collars? That sensitive art types will have to move to Delaware and take it over and establish it as a separate country with a flag bearing the album art of In The Aeroplane Over the Sea? We will go with yes. Yes, all of that will happen now.

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4 COMMENTS

  1. Never fear. The lack of a PATH train, the lack of a massive bus terminal and a significantly smaller rail hub will not allow downtown brooklyn to become anything close to Midtown South.

  2. Midtown South, not Midtown. Do a quick Google search if you’re not sure on the difference. This article makes absolutely no sense in light of David Colon’s fuck-up.

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