Baby, it’s not over ’til it’s over, except maybe even then it’s not really over until you find your pregnant ex in a pile of freeze-pops and spend the day playing parent-to-be until you’re both sobbing over soup in a greasy spoon.
That’s the crux of this week’s episode of Girls (with the on-the-nose title “What Will We Do This Time About Adam?”). The titular actor begins by explaining to Jessa that he has to pursue his true feelings for Hannah and ask her to raise this baby with her. (If we had to sit through his awful movie, we might start questioning a lot of our life choices, too.)
Jessa takes the news that he’ll be offering his paternal services (that sounds gross) to Hannah … well? Or at least it seems. He heads out into the sticky Brooklyn heat to find Hannah battling a busted AC by stuffing her dress full of freeze-pops at the local bodega. He tells her he wants to help raise the baby, and Hannah overcomes her initial shock to accept. (Blame the heatstroke.)
The two spend the day in bliss. They have the least Adam-Hannah sex we’ve ever seen. They’re gentle and smiling; it’s almost unsettling. It’s easy to get lulled into a sense of security between these two, as it’s felt like most of the season has been leading up to their eventual reconciliation. However, once they sit down at a diner for a late-night meal, it’s clear they’re not really in this. Adam is talking about artists’ housing and food co-ops and divvying up the bill duties when Hannah starts to cry. As nice as it all might sound, this isn’t what either of them really wants. Hannah heads home alone, and Adam goes back to Jessa.
She could use all the support she can get, because, as cool as Jessa seemed with this news, she spends the day falling apart. First, she fights with the cable company over the phone. She has to pause her tirade to quickly puke (oh, god, please not another pregnancy). Then she throws on a furry bra (classic Jessa) and heads over to Laird’s to freakout the baby. (Hey, remember Adam’s sister?)
When she’s done causing ruckus there, she heads into a dive, lures a rough dude with a neck tattoo into the bathroom for a quickie, but ends up breaking down crying in the aftermath. She makes it home in time to buzz Adam back into the apartment, but who knows what sort of mood she’ll be in.
Meanwhile, Ray and Shoshanna meet up with Shosh’s old boss Abigail (SNL’s Aidy Bryant). Even though Shosh is sure Ray will hate Abby, they actually hit it off. Abigail helps Ray with finishing Hermie’s (ugh) oral history project. The two spend the day being extra adorable together, even sharing a kiss on Jane’s Carousel.
But, wait, what about Shoshanna? Can’t she find love or a career or at least get a pregnancy?
There’s only two episodes left to find out if this whole thing ends with all of them pregnant, I guess. So let’s all make sure we’ve got our “elite” channels and discuss the moments from last night we loved so much we can’t even and the parts that were so ridiculous we can’t even.
We Can’t Even
Yes, of course, we love any chance to see Elijah in his undies, which, at this point, is more episodes than not. Could his nipples be the most seen throughout the series? Even more than Hannah’s? His reactions to the heatwave (“I’m too pretty to go a cooling center!;” “We’re going to die like those old people in Queens on NY 1!”) were the best lines of the night.
Honestly, raising the baby with Laird makes just as much sense (if not more) than doing it with Adam. Plus, he’s already got all the hand-me-downs.
Hannah’s sleepover party analogy was the best explanation yet for why she’s keeping the baby.
We’re thrilled to see Adam and Hannah realize they’re not each other’s happy ending, and that final scene between them was brilliant. It’s one of the series’ best.
We Can’t Even
Look, Jessa, no dive is going to OK you smoking in the bar (we’ve tried), and they certainly won’t in that furry bikini.
So not only is Ray making (ugh) a podcast (come on, technically Missing Richard Simmons was “oral history” too), but its about gentrification? That’s a little like the pot calling the kettle cold brew pour-over, or whatever.
What the fuck was up with Abby and Ray’s defining question? How about choosing to live in a nice apartment with a view of a shitty apartment means that you’re selfish and don’t give fuck about the community you’re in as long as you have a fucking doorman? Put that in your stupid podcast, wangs.
I know, girl, thinking about the pressures of a food co-op makes us cry too.
What did you think of this episode of Girls?
Leave a Reply