Brooklyn! Everyone wants to live here these days, but how can you be sure you really live here? If you’ve experienced any of these things that only a true Brooklynite has, you know that you definitely do!
1. Your license says “Brooklyn” in the space where the city goes
2. When you leave Manhattan to go home, you take a train marked “Brooklyn”
3. When filling out forms, you put “Brooklyn” in the town box
4. Or, you put “Kings” if the form asks what county you live in
5. If someone asks you “Hey, do you live in Manhattan?” you say “No, I live in Brooklyn.”
6. When people at a concert say “It’s nice to be here in Brooklyn,” sometimes you clap
7. You are eligible to vote for Brooklyn borough president
8. When people ask, “Which Whole Foods is in your borough, the SoHo one or the Brooklyn one?” You say “The Brooklyn one”
9. The geographic location of you home on a GPS system shows you to be east of Manhattan and Staten Island, and west and south of Queens (except for Rockaway, which you are north of)
10. When a friend says “My friend is moving to Brooklyn, you live there, right? Do you know anything about it you can share with them?” You respond: “Yes”
11. When you see a news story about something happening on or near the block you live on, the block is in Brooklyn
12. Your area code is 718, and you don’t live in Queens or Staten Island. Unless you’re still on your parents’ family plan, in which case never mind
13. When people say “the park” you immediately think they mean Prospect Park, because that’s the closest park to you
14. You read Brokelyn dot com to find things to do in the borough in which you live
15. If someone asks where you live, you say “Brooklyn.”
16. When you log on to weather dot com and put in Brooklyn, you get mad that it gives you the weather for Brooklyn, Ohio because that is not the Brooklyn where you live
17. The bus line you take to get home is identified by B[NUMBER]
18. When you step out the front door of your house in the morning, you are standing on a piece of land that is legally part of Brooklyn
19. When people you know see Brooklyn locations in TV or movies, they ask you “Hey, do you live near that? That’s in Brooklyn” or “Have you been there before? That’s in Brooklyn”
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This is the best thing ever.
This really is the best thing ever. Kudos to whoever wrote this.
But how do I know which part of Brooklyn I live in? Seriously, I just got here and I can’t remember which neighborhood I’m renting in.
20. You make stupid lists like this that aren’t funny.
This all sounds terribly desperate. You so want people to know you live in Brooklyn. This is easy. Does it say Brooklyn on your birth certificate or on you High School diploma? If not you may live in Brooklyn, but you are not “from” Brooklyn
What if you’re from Brooklyn but you went to LaGuardia High School?
Rules are if you have a Brooklyn Birth Certificate and/or a diploma (or dropped out of) a Brooklyn High School you are from Brooklyn. Everyone else is an immigrant or a transplant at best. sorry those are the rules. The executive committee can change those rules with a majority vote. If you are from Brooklyn you are eligible to attend executive committee meetings. If you don’t know when and where those meetings are you are not from Brooklyn. Everybody is welcome to live in Brooklyn, but to really be “from” Brooklyn is an entirely different thing.
Sorry, TL;DR. Can you put this in list form with GIFs?
what if you were born in a hospital in queens and went to Bronx science but your family always lived in brooklyn?
also, by your count, my brother is -from- brooklyn even though he spent from 6-21 in the suburbs and 21-48 in Manhattan. that doesn’t really seem right does it?
I consulted with the executive committee. You are from Brooklyn and so is your bother. Quick question for your brother; When he refers to “The City” does he mean the anywhere in the 5 boroughs or just Manhattan ? This is important
is this a joke?
You must be one of of those joke detectives I keep hearing about. Astutely recognized, sir!
ways to know you live in brooklyn…
…you live in brooklyn.
goodbye.
thanks for the tip
20. You get irritated at alleged Brooklyn-boosting lists because they assume the closest park to you is Prospect Park; a park you spend almost no time in because, well, Ft. Greene Park is much closer.
What if you live closer to Sunset Park? Is that #21?
Marine Park for me! I agree, #13 didn’t work because there are a lot of parks in the 75 square miles that make up Brooklyn.
I’m starting to think that of the people who shared this, only a tiny percentage recognized it as satire.
19 ways you make buzzfeed look impressive.
I guess it’s cool to live in Brooklyn or something
oh my god. i appreciate this so much.
it’s like every dumb “true brooklynite/new yorker” list is about yuppies, transplants, white people, and/or jaded cynics.
If you can expand this into a five minute bit, I’ve got an open mic slot with your name on it.
Pretty unfunny, even for satire
if you think this is the best thing ever you are the worst thing ever
is the Bronx not 718 anymore?
Ah, there’s that dry Brooklyn wit we all know and love so much!
i know i live in brooklyn because when anyone includes photos of my hometown borough, they only include the bridge, as though thats the only thing to see in the world’s greatest borough.
some other ideas
-grand army plaza
– promenade
– museum
– botanic gardens
– coney island
– sheapshead bay
– flatbush avenue
– eastern parkway
– ocean parkway
– kensington
– brooklyn college
This is simply brilliant.