For the truly brave. via Facebook

Newtown Creek is full of, to put it mildly, doody. Even beyond that, it’s a waterway that’s our industrial forebears were nice enough to share all of their runoff waste with it too, so it’s also full of other various pollutants. That being said, you need to take your water activities where you can get them around here, so the brave souls at the North Brooklyn Boat Club are offering free kayaking and canoeing this Saturday, May 3 at noon. All you need to do is bring yourself and your sense of adventure, they provide the canoes and kayaks and lifejackets.

They don’t provide those nifty breathing masks that scuba divers use though, so for the love of god, make sure you don’t fall in and get some of the water in your mouth. The kayaks and canoes will be shoving off between noon and 4pm on Saturday, with the trip going from the North Brooklyn Boat Club’s dock to the mouth of the East River lasting about 20 minutes. Trips will be led by experienced paddlers, who will be there to let you know how to get the vessels going, and presumably save you from paddling yourself into the East River and never being seen again.

All joking aside, it’s not like going out on a kayak isn’t a nice spring activity, and the NBBC folks do point out that your seafaring adventure will provide great views of Manhattan, from a perspective you usually don’t get. Is that worth the risk of falling into the Newtown Creek and potentially being transformed into the Toxic Adventure? Actually, it does.

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