Photo by @angelotirambulo / Insta

If all of New York City were to instate this kind of barter economy, there’s a good possibility the streets would be clear of waste and the civilians wasted on a daily basis (is it a coincidence so many English synonyms for garbage are also terms for being drunk as hell? Does this happen in other languages too? Please endow us with your insights in the comments).

A new local organization, founded by Sarah Back and composed of neighborhood residents and businesses called Keep Bushwick Beautiful is hosting a Clean the Streets initiative where volunteer trash-collectors will be rewarded with free food and drink. The goal of the event is to, “clean up street trash and keep parks looking good,” Beck told us in an email. The next Clean the Streets event will be this Sunday from noon to 2pm, focusing on the litter around the Morgan Ave. stop on the L line.

The event is sponsored by Lantern Hall, a craft beer bar serving up American diner food from a garage-like, one-story building on Morgan and Knickerbocker. Trash bags and gloves will be provided. One bag of trash will earn you the House Lager beer, a well drink or a glass of wine. There will also be trays of cheesy and non-cheesy tater tots available to litter fighters.

If you’re to take this article’s title literally and attempt to fulfill the pun of getting trashed off trash, depending on your tolerance you’ll probably need to collect around five to ten bags of trash, which is pretty ambitious. If you’re a lightweight you can probably get tipsy on trash with a one or two bags, but that’s not nearly as headline-worthy.

If you can find some trash as big as this piano you’ll probably be able to earn yourself some five well drinks (and plenty of back problems) in a single haul.

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