06/24/16 6:00pm
No case is too big, no fee is too big.

Who you gonna call when they don’t text back?

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Ticketmaster offered you some (pretty terrible) free tickets.

We showed you how to stay outside every single moment this summer.

A new web series introduced us to the Ghostedbusters.

We gave you a discount to the best new outdoor dance party of the summer.

Trump’s campaign revealed it’s so broke, he couldn’t even buy a Brooklyn brownstone.

This quiz helped you determine how many roommates you can tolerate.

“Star Wars editor” became a real job you can apply for.

We gave you some free summer workouts you can still do in time for beach season.

We took you inside Prose Bowl, the American Idol of reading series.

We told you how to do free yoga nearly every day of the week this summer.

06/24/16 1:04pm
Transmitter Park in Greenpoint is one of the places to catch free outdoor yoga this summer. Via goodyoga.

Transmitter Park in Greenpoint is one of the places to catch free outdoor yoga this summer. Via goodyoga.

It’s a stressful time in the world right now, what with a Brexit shaking up the world economy and a somber Pride weekend kicking off, not to mention the overstuffed man suit alien Men in Black currently running for president as a Republican. On top of all that, you have your job, which maybe doesn’t give you as much outside or active time as you’d like to have this summer.

The good news is you can de-stress yourself for free before, after and during work all summer long thanks to a big selection of free yoga classes around Brooklyn, most of them outdoors too. You can get up early to do a lotus pose in Prospect Park, pop by BRIC for a free lunch stretch accompanied by music or check out the Navy Yard’s new boardwalk/landscape to do some downward facing dog after you clock out. Here’s how to do free yoga nearly every day of the week this summer. (more…)

06/23/16 1:50pm
Cyclone: You don't look a day over 80. Via Luna Park.

Happy birthday, Cyclone:! You don’t look a day over 80. Via Luna Park.

Few beloved things in this city can turn 89 years old without fear of being replaced by a bank or turned into a condo. Luckily for us, the Coney Island Cyclone is protected from such a fate: The iconic wooden roller coaster has been a New York City landmark since 1988, meaning it’s not going to be replaced by a White Castle any time soon. The ride, one of the Truly Best Things in Brooklyn, turns 89 on Sunday. To celebrate, Luna Park is giving out free rides.  (more…)

06/23/16 11:41am
Now serving: Piping hot memes. Via @NoMe_Simpatizas

Now serving: Piping hot memes, trending playlists. Via @NoMe_Simpatizas

“Brunch” and “Williamsburg” are two New York City things lots of people who have nothing better to argue about get irrationally passionate over. There was a time [he said, scratching his long and tangled gray beard] when “Williamsburg” was used synonymously with “hipster,” then the neighborhood changed, became scary to Omar from The Wire, got less weird, got more condos, and now when you say the word Williamsburg, it conjures up images of the neighborhood’s transition into becoming the new Soho.

So I’m not sure what scene is even meant to be invoked by calling a Spotify playlist “Williamsburg Brunch” any more, but it’s definitely a hit: The playlist, made by an arm of Sony, has more than 8,400 followers, a huge number that even President Obama’s playlists can’t match.  (more…)

06/22/16 1:40pm
The Ghostedbusters (L to R): Emily Fleming, Marie Cecile Anderson, Sharron Paul and Jackie Zebrowski.

The Ghostedbusters (L to R): Sharron Paul, Marie Cecile Anderson, Emily Fleming and Jackie Zebrowski.

We call it “ghosting” when someone you’ve dated/hooked up with drunkenly a few times (same thing amiright) stops texting you back because you wonder if they’ve died or otherwise transitioned to the spirit realm where fingers no longer exist. Usually they’re not dead, of course, and then you catch this person Instagramming their brunch and you’re like, “THAT WAS OUR THING!!” Do you ever wish you could dispatch a task force to find out exactly what the hell happened that led someone to disappear on you?

That’s the premise of the new comedy web series Ghostedbustersin which a foursome of investigators, played by local comedians, takes on cases of ghosting to hunt down the perpetrators. Instead of shooting proton lasers and forcing them into a tiny trap, they shoot questions at them and force them into awkward situations.

Co-creators Emily Fleming and Marie Cecile Anderson were inspired by trailers for the new Ghostbusters movie due out next month, and also by their own real-life romantic frustrations.

“We both had just hit a wall with guys we are dating. For me, there were several different situations of being ghosted,” Anderson said. “It just hit us: this is the perfect time. We just looked at each other like, ‘Oh my god, we have to do Ghostedbusters.’ ”

Their main aim is humor, but they hope it opens up some people’s eyes to what it’s like to be slimed by a relationship ghost.  (more…)

06/22/16 10:44am
Star Wars: The Editor Strikes Back.

Star Wars: The Editor Strikes Back.

Put down that fan fiction you’ve been working on that ships Rey and Leia and that weird slash porn of Chewbacca and BB-8 you should probably keep to yourself anyway. Here’s your chance to turn your love of the Star Wars extended universe into a real job. Disney, the sweatshop factory pumping out Star Wars-related merchandise until the heat death of the universe, is hiring a “Star Wars editor,” which is probably the coolest name for an editing job to come along since Highlights magazine’s dinosaur editor. The gig is based in San Francisco and involves working on comics, magazines, books and other tie-in materials that will put your red lightsaber editing pen to much use. (more…)

06/21/16 10:39am
Trump's campaign is under water. Via Trump's Facebook.

Trump’s campaign is under water. Via Trump’s Facebook.

Mr. Trump began June with just $1.3 million in cash on hand, a figure more typical for a campaign for the House of Representatives than the White House. He trailed Hillary Clinton, who raised more than $28 million in May, by more than $41 million, according to reports filed late Monday night with the Federal Election Commission.

New York Times, June 20, 2016

15 things Trump’s campaign couldn’t afford:

-A house with a two-car garage in Ditmas Park ($2.2 million)

Two city run animal shelters ($10 million)

-A three-bedroom condo in the Edge in Williamsburg ($2.6 million)

-The 1,100 packed containers of retail-ready liquid THC, liquid PCP, liquid HGH, psychedelic mushrooms seized by cops in Brooklyn in March ($2.5 million street value) (more…)

06/20/16 9:10am
You probably have a bunch of free Ticketmaster tickets waiting for you

Via Flickr user ginnerobot.

Ticketmaster has always felt like the worst and you’ve probably had this hunch that something shady was going on with them since high school, when you tried to buy Metallica and Ruff Ryders tickets only to be faced with ridiculous extra fees. Well it turns out you were right all along: Ticketmaster always was the worst, charging you exorbitant fees since 1999. That’s according to a class action lawsuit, Schlesinger v. Ticketmaster, which determined the corporate middleman jacked-up fees for things like “order-processing” and shipping costs to the detriment of you, the consumer.

The settlement Ticketmaster agreed to basically means they owes you a ton of money if you bought any tickets through them from 1999 to 2013. But in typical Ticketmaster fashion, instead of just giving you the money, you have to order more tickets to claim it. The good news is you probably have free tickets waiting for you right now. (more…)

06/16/16 3:17pm
Farewell, Brooklyn's best punchline: The artisanal mayo store got priced out (but maybe not for good)

Empire Mayo’s Vanderbilt Avenue home now has a for-rent sign outside. Photo by Tim Donnelly/Brokelyn.

Nothing has ever landed on our doorstep in quite such a neatly wrapped bundle of punchlines as the Brooklyn artisanal mayonnaise store, which opened in Prospect Heights in 2012. It became shorthand for just how far Brooklyn’s food preciousness had gone, rescuing even lowly mayonnaise from the depths of low-class condiment prison into Empire Mayo’s small shop on already excessively cute Vanderbilt Avenue. SNL joked about it, Good ran a story titled “Why mayonnaise matters in the gentrification debate,” the Wall Street Journal wrote simply “Yes, artisanal mayo.”

You might need a new small business strawman to pick on soon: Empire Mayo is closing its store at the end of July, though the brand will probably live on online or in another store TBD. (more…)

06/16/16 11:31am
James Hook, a dad, wants to iron your clothes, just like your real dad. Via Pete's Candy Store.

James Hook, a dad, wants to iron your clothes, just like your real dad. Via Pete’s Candy Store.

At the intersection where performance art meets downright helpful chore-doing we find this new installment/service at Pete’s Candy Store. Pete’s is known for its cool events, its diabolically difficult trivia night and for having a nice backyard in which to hang. Now it’s the place to get your clothes ironed, for free, while you drink. Greenpoint dad James Hook told the Brooklyn Paper he loves ironing so much he wanted to bring it into a public forum, and is offering to do it for free every Tuesday night in July, from 9pm-midnight.

“I love ironing, I really do,” Hook, who works at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden when he isn’t ironing for his three kids, told the paper. “I feel in order to perfect it, I need to bring it into a public forum — I feel you need to have people judging your work beyond your friends and family.” (more…)