New study finds less teenage sluttiness = more happiness

This is why you’re sad. via Too Many Kisses

Attention nerds: while we know you voluntarily waited to have sex until you were 20 (you had to fend the women off with a stick while playing Warcraft, obvs), you actually made the right decision because a new study in the journal Psychological Science  finds that people who waited until they were 20 to have sex are “less dissatisfied” in long-term relationships.

Dr. Paige Harden, at the University of Texas at Austin, used long-term data to compare the ages of when people first had sex with their emotional and financial satisfaction later in life. She confirmed the obvious: less teenage sex equals a better life in the long term. Participants who waited until they were 20 to enter the bone zone earned more money, were better educated, had fewer romantic partners, and were less likely to be married.

If they were married, however, the people who waited to do it weren’t as dissatisfied with their relationships. Satisfaction was defined in the following ways:

  • We enjoy doing even ordinary “day-today” things together;
  • I am satisfied with the way we handle our problems and disagreements;
  • I am satisfied with the way we handle family finances;
  • My partner listens to me when I need someone to talk to;
  • My partner expresses love and affection to me,
  • I am satisfied with our sex life.

Sadly, maybe less dissatisfaction is the best we can really hope for. But is happiness in the long run really worth missing out on awkward teenage fumbling? What are you supposed to talk about over beers with friends? And how can you Facebook stalk exes if you don’t have any? Also, this study seems a little fishy, in the way that sweeping generalizations make us utter, “That’s racist!” What do you think?


  1. 2stoopid2no

    makes sense. it relates to delayed gratification. people who thinks things through and plan things out actually do better in the long run. people who tend to have sex earlier tend to be prone to riskier hence much more dangerous behavior and hence might not live so long. so stop being a douchebag!

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