As one of our writers can attest to recently, it’s extremely frustrating to order something to be shipped to your apartment, only to not be around when UPS or FedEx comes knocking. Not if you have a doorman, we guess, but who actually has a freaking doorman? Enter Parcel, a new service that will pick your package up for you and then deliver it to your door when you’re actually home. On the one hand, this is the ultimate middleman act. On the other hand, it just might be worth an extra five bucks to avoid ever seeing one of those infuriating slips telling you your package couldn’t be delivered again.
It’s a simple idea, so simple in fact, that we’re a little nervous this is just a scheme to collect people’s packages and rifle through them. But, if you trust the Parcel folks, it work like this: you sign up with them and then provide a special address they give you, to enter as your shipping address for online orders. Then when they get the package, they text you to set up a delivery time between 7pm and 11pm.
Parcel is free up until January 15, and after that it’ll run you five bucks per delivery. Like we said, it’s basically the definition of a middleman. But everyone slags the middleman and talks about cutting them out, until they need them around, and in this instance, you could probably actually use one. You’ve gotta work, or day drink or basically do anything in the world other than wait around for a package. It’s either that or rely on a friend to get the package, but if they’re just sitting around all afternoon with their dick in their hands, they might not be too reliable.
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Sadly, they are currently operating only in Manhattan, so it’s useless to us Brooklyn folks, for now. Back to stalking the man in the brown uniform.