Craigslist freebie of the day: Free sex swing stand, barely used!

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Donate it to a school, say it’s a jungle gym

Between Texas being unable to pass an anti-abortion law and the Supreme Court mandating that everyone go be gay with each other, there are definitely some sexy vibes in the air. Maybe you don’t want normal vanilla sexy times though. In which case, swing by this Craiglister’s Prospect Heights apartment today and pick up his free TLC Universal Sex Swing Stand. Only used “a few times!”

What better weekend to explore passions you’ve been keeping secret than this weekend? “Ted” says he’s giving this baby away because he’s moving, and that it’s mostly been sitting under his bed unused. Sadly, it doesn’t come with a swing, but you can DIY one, or buy one on Amazon for seventy-five bucks.

RabbitVibrations, the makers of the stand, are pretty confident in their product, asserting that it can hold up to 400 pounds, promise that the stand comes bondage-ready and is the end of you putting holes in the ceiling And don’t worry, even though this comes unconstructed, Ted will give you the instructions to put it together so that the only holes you have to worry about are [REDACTED].

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  1. Shame on you, Brokelyn, for promoting the most deviant practice I can think of: socialism. Next thing we know you’ll tell me I have to share this thing with someone, after driving all of the way in from Long Island to pick it up. Communists!

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