Sucker born every minute: Greenpoint man hosts home leech therapy

leeches

You laugh, but then you realize it’s cheaper than your co-pay

Well the old world may be dead, but it’s still alive and kicking sucking in Greenpoint, where a man has a home leech therapy clinic run out of his loft to help people with ailments like paralysis, migraines and fartiness. Despite the fact that the words “Greenpoint” “old-world medicine” and “loft” would point to this being a case of throwback try-hardism, leech king Andrew Plucinski is in fact a middle-aged Polish immigrant, not a bearded twentysomething trying out a new brand.

The Guardian used Plucinski as the centerpiece of a story about the fact that yes, people still use leeches in lieu of things like doctors or heroin or just ignoring that pulsing thing on your neck until it goes away. Plucinski, whose clients lean more towards immigrants who find him through word of mouth, claims in the story that leeches can solve 98 percent of all health problems. Also, in keeping with Brooklyn’s DIY spirit, Plucinski also told the paper that he’s fighting against entrenched medical interests who are only upset at the idea of being driven out of business because of his medical disruption.

If you want to be healed up with leeches, that’s fine we suppose. But we can’t completely get behind¬†Plucinski, because he also takes a shot at beloved New York institution Dr. Zizmor in the inteview, telling¬†The Guardian that the good doctor is a “moron” who doesn’t realize acne cures are about cleaning the liver as opposed to proprietary chemical peels.