Science has wondered for decades now: can men grow beards? Despite ample evidence through the centuries that yes, the male face tends to sprout hair at an impressive clip, the question wasn’t truly settled until recently when people in Brooklyn started growing beards. Suddenly, because of our facial hair-friendly population, beards are everywhere according to the New York Times. Not just regular beards. Brooklyn beards.
“The Brooklyn Beard Goes Mainstream” is the headline for a new Times article that studies a physiological phenomenon that is literally as natural as breathing air. The Times noticed that a crew as diverse as Obama spokesman Jay Carney, Goldman Sachs evil guy in charge Lloyd Blankfein and the entire Boston Red Sox roster have picked up “the Bushwick-inflected fashion statement.” Which, great, just another thing to blame on Brooklyn that we didn’t ask for, like the fact that Mumford and Suns is popular.
Typically, the Times managed to ignore hockey’s long and beautiful tradition of playoff beards when they went over the different athletes growing beards like Andrew Luck, or attention-seeking middle-of-the-road relief pitcher/clown Brian Wilson. Anyway, we hereby petition for beards to be permanently referred to as “the L-train look” in the pages of the Times as punishment for this very silly article.