Man falls asleep on F train, wakes up with no identity

f train

F, for “Fuck I can’t believe I got my identity stolen on this fucking train.” via Flickr user Brian

We’ve all fallen asleep on the train, either from being exhausted from work or from being drunk*. That being said, we’ve usually been sure not to have pretty much every piece of identification establishing who we are on our person at the time we fell asleep. One unfortunate person from Massachusetts fell asleep on the F train recently, and woke up without his birth certificate, Social Security card, passport and basically every other piece of government ID he had. Maybe the thief is preparing him for some version of The Game?

DNA Info reports that the waking nightmare started around 4:15am somewhere between the West 4th Street and Jay Street stations. That’s where police say someone jacked a bag from a 23-year-old that contained the following: his birth certificate, state ID, passport, Social Security card and two cellphones. There are no suspects thus far because the guy was sleeping when the bag got jacked. But then again, how can the police even be sure this guy is who he says he is? Maybe we’re the ones playing The Game that this “victim” has designed…

*Have you not done that? Tell us in the comments so we know which email addresses to sell to spam farms!