Concrete jungle where something something. All photos by Mary Dorn.

You know you’re in Manhattan when the check arrives.

Living in the coolest place on earth, you find you get swallowed up in the hype, getting high on your own home-grown kombucha, as it were. But just across a river lies an island dubbed “The City that Never Sleeps.” The center of the world and home of pizza places named after a series of men named Ray; the place so important to the imagination of the world that Las Vegas has a casino themed after it. Even Egypt doesn’t get to claim the Luxor, and THAT’S A COUNTRY. What had I been taking for granted, living in my homemade duplex in a former warehouse, when famous dead guys like Jack Kerouac, O.Henry, and Lou Reed (he’s dead, right?) had been living less than 5 miles away, making the art that we’ve been stocking our cement block bookshelves with over here?  (more…)

What treasures await educated bargain hunters? via Flickr user emily geoff

I LOVE to shop, but this habit of mine comes with some unfortunate side effects.

In the past, I’ve hit up an outlet spot like DSW, thinking I’m getting a deal on some pair of Aldo boots or something that still comes out to like, 100 freaking dollars, and then 6 months later the zipper breaks and the heel pops off. Or there’s the time I spent $60 on some dress at Topshop, since that’s apparently the going rate nowadays for something that cost $2 to make, only to have the seam inexplicably unravel and leave me half-naked in line at some Duane Reade NOT within walking distance from my house.

F that.

I don’t know about you guys, but these betrayals, which always occur after I justify a higher-than-normal purchase price, are what caused me to look into other cheaper outlets to do all my shopping. And let me tell you, Brooklyn’s very own Fulton Mall is the place to Get. Shit. Done. The amount of times I’ve spent more than $30 on a single item are zero, and I’m still rocking things bought from years past. Here’s a little guide to help you save in your wallet and amp up your wardrobe, minus the morning after guilt. (more…)

Yep, people were pretty excited about Smorgasburg being back on the waterfront. Photo by Joseph Delaney

The sun was shining, the tweeters were tweeting and the air was fragrant with the scents of local fare at the official re-opening of Smorgasburg in Williamsburg last Saturday. To properly throw myself into the warm-weather tradition of staying outside as long as possible while eating as much as possible, I set out to spend the day sampling vendors’ creations without spending the majority of the week’s expendable income. And for less than an entire $20, I enjoyed a selection that made me feel like I ate twice as much as that. Follow my advice and you can, too! (more…)

Let’s get physical. Fiscally physical.

I’ve been getting around — with fitness centers in Brooklyn and lower Manhattan, that is. In two months I have been with six different gyms. While I was with some for as long as a month, others were completely shameless one-day stands.

On New Year’s Day I received an e-mail from New York Sports Club, which, like an ex-boyfriend, was begging to have me back, and offering a deal as incentive: Thirty days for $30. Was I willing to get back with an ex for a dollar a day? You bet I was. The trick would be avoiding a commitment to this relationship, which would cost $70 a month if I joined after the trial. On day 30, an employee asked if I was interested in joining. I shrugged and told her I couldn’t afford it. What can I say, NYSC? It’s not you, it’s me.

Plus, this is New York, a city of opportunity. There must be promotions and free trials at every gym, and no-one would ever know if I took advantage of every one. With an impudent grin, I got on my MacBook and started googling.Here is my guide to promiscuous free gym trials in and around Brooklyn. (more…)

Paradise found. via Flickr user luca.sartoni

Real talk: short sleeves, warm weather, cold beer, and free shows with your friends is hard to beat. But it’s still winter. If, like me, you are too broke to afford even thinking about Coachella without a collection agency potentially calling you, but desperately need warm weather and music, you might think you’re out of luck. There’s always South by Southwest, but the annual industry showcase/rolling boozefest requires an expensive flight, an expensive hotel, an expensive badge and expensive food. Or does it?

Allow me to offer you the potential to go to South by Southwest for little over the price of a month’s rent. Now, for declamatory purposes I must state from the outset that all expenses were accurate at the time of the research, prices go up closer to the time, the snooze/lose correlation is as inescapable as death or taxes. But enough about taxes and onto Texas, and how to get there. (more…)

This Metro experience could be yours! Photo via WTOP.

President Obama is being inaugurated on Monday, and now that you know how to make the trip, it’s also important to consider what to do once you’re down there. Or rather, in a small city whose population is about to temporarily skyrocket, it’s more important to consider what not to do so as not to get lumped in with the huddled masses donning American flag t-shirts and cowboy hats (really). Here are three crucial things to avoid in our nation’s capital, brought to you by a former DC resident who was present at the last Inauguration.  (more…)

Good luck getting this close. via Flickr user GJB Photography

It’s not 2009 anymore, and Obama’s re-election is more of a collective sigh of relief (for most of us) than cause for a massive celebration. But there’s no shame in wanting to head down to see the swearing-in first hand, and even if you’re not lucky enough to win a free ticket, you can still check out the action from a public viewing spot by the National Mall. Of course, there are the logistics, since getting down to DC from New York might require selling your firstborn to the Lords of Amtrak for a $158 ticket. But, worry not, Obama-loving Brokesters! We’ve got a two cheap ways to head down to the nation’s capital, plus a couple spots where you can celebrate the swearing-in from your own beloved Brooklyn. (more…)

How they used to make hot toddys in olden times. Also, current times. Via Kaufmann-Mercantile.

Although I find it hard to think of a time during which a frosty beer isn’t paramount, a warm drink heavy with booze beats the brew on these winter days, especially on today, National Hot Toddy Day! Unfortunately, that usually entails a price hike from your typical Tecate plus tequila shot. But the fact is it’s cold (in theory), your apartment is expensive to heat and you’re soon going to be craving human contact that doesn’t involve the Downton Abbey characters.

After calling over 30 bars around the borough and visiting way too many — and sampling way, way, way too many — I can confidently say I found the five places in Brooklyn with the best value for a warm drink. Each of the places listed below hawk the well-crafted hot for eight bucks or less, pairing the elixir with a cozy environment. And no, it’s not all just your Auntie Margo’s hot toddy. (more…)

Get it bumping at Fort Greene’s “Make Music” parade

Aah, the holidays. A special time of year when we seem to collectively clamour for the title of “Most Destitute: 2013.” Winners are to be announced the first week of January at a special ceremony in your local bodega when your friendly clerk tells you that you cannot charge a quart of milk to your card “for some reason.” Chances are that right now, you have presents to buy (although hopefully you’re nearly finished), parties to attend, and family to see. Or maybe you’re staying in the city over the holidays for the first time either by choice or financial constraint. It’s a wallet-crushing time of year but fear not, there are still many things to see and ways to enjoy yourself this week that won’t add (much) to your impending financial woes. (more…)

They don’t have this in July. Flickr photo via beau-dog.

Summer in the city gets a lot more love than winter, some of it deserved, some not. Winter doesn’t have the free concerts, Shakespeare in the Park, and the general opportunity to make any event fun by the addition of the word “outside.” But summer doesn’t have snow, when the city becomes oddly, deliciously quiet and the only sounds are millions of people gradually unclenching knotted shoulders. There’s a better world out there than the one of winter boyfriends. Some suggestions on how to enjoy it:

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