Brooklyn’s top Spotify choice is unconscionably lame

Ugh

Haim, demonstrating what their music does to the author. via Facebook

The thing about new Brooklyn being flooded with new people and getting more expensive was that it was at least supposed to be because Brooklyn was cool. But have we overstated that coolness? It’s not just about getting chased out of Philadelphia, it’s about Brooklyn making choices as a borough that are just bafflingly uncool. For instance, Spotify shared New York City’s Top 10 songs played on their service, broken down by borough. Brooklyn’s number one? The bland, vanilla shlock is that Haim’s “The Wire.”

Gizmodo shared the list with the world, broadcasting our shameful choice out to all of their readers. “The Wire” isn’t even a bad enough song to throw epithets at and angrily call hot garbage. It’s just a lifeless mash up of Sheryl Crow and Shania Twain and the best proof that 90s nostalgia is so goddamn skewed that “Man, I Feel Like A Woman” can be held up as some kind of influential generational capstone.

Shame, shame on all of us for letting this happen. Serious question: Is everyone OK? Are we depressed about the summer ending? This kind of acting out can’t lead to anything good. Accept warmed over crap like this one day, and the next day Junior’s is replaced by a TGI Friday’s and Di Fara becomes a Pizza Hut.

13 Comment

  • umm this assumes that everyone in brooklyn is using spotify.

    maybe this story just proves that everyone who uses spotify in brooklyn is “lame”. What happened to the hipster stereotype of us listening to records? clearly that’s not taken into account. how about ipods in general? i see tons of people with their little white buds in listening to music on the train everyday and those people clearly aren’t using spotify.

    although i get the point of the article, it should be defending us with information like i just said rather than the complete opposite. thanks brokelyn. you havn’t sponsored a party in over a year (i think) and now this.

  • I have to strongly disagree with your assessment of Haim. They are actually cool and good at music. Have you listened to the whole album? Do you have something better you’d like at the top of the list? Japanese noise-punk? Edgy, thy name is David Colon.

    • Haim is garbage. I saw their ugly asses at Governor’s Ball, and they were terrible. If I was a girl and I played guitar, I would be famous.

      • You HAD to insert “ugly” in there, just because they’re women. How is that fucking relevant to the quality of their music?

        • I called them ugly, because the bass player makes ugly faces when she “rocks out” on the bass.

          It’s irrelevant. I love lots of female artists. Haim is still are terrible.

    • I love this comment for 9 different reasons, especially that this person is willing to risk a hate storm by defending Haim.

  • Haim sucks, but pretty sure the author isn’t qualified to talk about music at all. Keep on hating on.

  • “I don’t like Haim, which makes people who do wrong.” -David Colon

  • You’re certainly entitled to dislike Haim, but this post is misleading/seems to assume that they are some widely reviled band. In fact, they are pretty critically respected: see http://www.metacritic.com/music/days-are-gone/haim (lol at Jon Caramanica of the Times calling them “impossible to hate” – guess not!)

    They’re nothing groundbreaking but I find them to be good pop songwriters. Also, really don’t think they are going for “90s nostalgia” at all. Clearly very little research and a lot of vitriol was put into this post.

  • Is there a way to not read anything this creator posted. I have read endless articles on how they’re critically accepted in the music world, and all the good things they’re doing… I’m tired of hipster losers trying to defend a certain area.. Let’s talk about not being cool and it’s probably posting about how un-cool other people are for liking a decent song.

  • David you’re the man!