Brooklyn is underage drinking paradise: State Liquor Authority

Works in Brooklyn!

Works in Brooklyn!

There are certain important milestones for teens as they grow up from horrible teenagers to horrible adults. Rolling your eyes when your parents talk to you. Touching a boob. Smoking a cigarette because fuck it man, life doesn’t matter. And of course, buying beer even though you’re under 21. If a new report from the State Liquor Authority is any indication, Brooklyn is the best place for budding teen dirtbags to find themselves, because every liquor store except for one in Brooklyn sold booze to a teen working as part of an SLA sting. We truly are a borough of overachievers.

According to Governor Cuomo’s office, the State Liquor Authority went to 74 grocery and liquor stores across the city with a decoy teen dirtbag. In 32 instances, those stores sold booze to the decoy teen, because those stores are staffed by cool dudes who know how to party. Sixteen stores were visited in Brooklyn, and 15 of them were down to sell booze to kids, which is an astounding 94%  of stores visited. Queens and Staten Island were well behind, with 50% of the stores selling booze to the decoy teens, proving as always, that Brooklyn is number one.

So buck up teens. The city’s smoking age might be 21, but as this report shows, it probably doesn’t really matter that much.