Apartment Hunt: ‘Anne Hathaway’s birthday’ edition

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Happy birthday to fellow Brooklynite Anne Hathaway, one of us (albeit one who’s not on as tight of a budget as we are). What this week’s cheap apartments have in common is that they’re across-the-board awesome. Like, break-your-lease kind of awesome. But we’ll spare you the multi-hyphenates and let you be the judge. We’ve got everything from Crown Heights to Bay Ridge—we even found something in Park Slope. True story, though: one of the apartments I was going to post has already disappeared, so clearly product is flying off the shelves. Let’s get to it.

Save the best for first: this no-fee four-bedroom, two-bathroom in Crown Heights is only $2,636. That’s shy of $700 per roommate, AND two of you can pee at the same time. Actually, make that three if you include your pet. You’ll be first in to this newly-renovated—and yet still ‘prewar’—spot, so expect brand spankin’ new everything. Dishwasher: check. Laundry room: check. Doorman: check. One caveat, though. The listing advertises this price as “net rent.” That could mean hidden extras, so make sure to ask about this before you sign. Off the Utica 3/4.

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This $3,000 pre-war four-bedroom in the Kensington/Borough Park/Ditmas Park triangle also has 2 bathrooms, though you can’t bring your pet to this one. However, the bedrooms are at opposite corners of the apartment—so you can, ahem, bring guests. Apparently there’s a master bedroom, which might mean uneven rent-splitting. Also, microwave! Also, cable-ready!  It is a walkup on the top floor, though, so make sure to find out how many floors you’ll actually be walking up. Off the F/G at Church Av.

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If you scale down a bedroom, the best gets better, bathroom-wise. This 3-bedroom duplex apartment in Bed-Stuy has 2.5 bathrooms. So for a mere $2,500, everyone can go! Whenever! As if that and the duplex weren’t reason enough, you’ll get your own private backyard, too. More upsides: Eat-in kitchen, storage space and hardwood flooring. Downside: fireplaces are strictly decorative. Don’t be deterred by the low-def listing photos, just go and check it out for yourself. Off the Kingston-Throop C, the Utica and the Kosciuszko J.

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Affordable Park Slope Alert (A.P.S.A.)! Unlike most Park Slope listings, this $2,700 3-bedroom apartment is actually in Park Slope. Doorman & pre-war, eat-in kitchen, and just over a block from Prospect Park. And look at those photos! We’re just a wee bit skeptical about the whole 3-bedroom thing, since the listing later mentions that “both” bedrooms have closets. That could mean the number is actually two. Do us a favor and fact-check onsite if you’re thinking about renting. Off the Prospect Park F/G.

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Moving from Park Slope to Park Place, things get a little pricier and a little prettier. We found a $2,800 3-bedroom apartment in Crown Heights that’s almost too dreamy-looking to be real! Just like My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. And while there are no probably no colorful horses included in the rent, there is plenty of hardwood flooring and ample natural light that you can bask in. You’ll be on the 2nd floor of a multi-family prewar brick building, which even has garages! Oooh. Maybe there are secret ponies. Off the Kingston 3 or the Utica 3/4.

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The last of our 3 bedrooms on the docket is this prewar cheapie in Prospect-Lefferts, only $1,860! It may be less to look at, but the price is definitely right. And supposedly it is “spacious,” as well as located on the ground floor for the lazies. The listing is adamant about the size of the coat closet at this Brooklyn pad: it is notoriously B.I.G. Separate kitchen, pets allowed. Off the Winthrop 2/5.

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Our last apartment is in Bay Ridge, a real pretty 2-bedroom number for $1,750. It’s the corner unit of a doorman, prewar building. Comes with a living room, a ceramic-tiled fireplace, and the kind of architecture you miss from the good old days. But best of all, you get the waterfront a few blocks away. For the hermits, the cheap-seekers and, look, a Panera Bread! the Off the Bay Ridge Ave. R train.