1. Get bonafide NYC theater vet Nessa Norich to help you out with your festering creative idea at the Muse Workshop at Brooklyn Launchpad (Friday)
2. Get all the jokes you can handle as New York’s best comedians get together at the Bell House and tell the first joke each of them wrote for 2014, at 50 First Jokes (Friday)
3. Learn how to embroider a tea towel at the Greenpoint Library, and bring some class to your filthy hovel (Saturday)
4. It’s the Brooklyn Museum’s first First Saturday of 2014, and the first first one won’t come around again until 2015, so get there (Saturday)
5. Learn everything you’ve ever wanted to know about tarot and astrology, and possibly why you should be very afraid of it, at Catland Books (Saturday)
6. Pay tribute to the humble synthesizer at Discosynthesis, a whole dance party built around the instrument’s robotic grooves (Saturday)
7. Gather with fellow Game of Thrones nerds for trivia at Over the Eight. Bring your broadsword or whatever the hell they use to kill each other on that show (Sunday)
8. Bodega Bar’s monthly storytelling event includes Brokelyn writers Sam Corbin, Fikriyyah George and Kala Jerzy, so go see them tell some stories and then chat with them about being broke (Sunday)
9. It’s your last chance to go ice skating at McCarren Park until the rink opens again. Who knows, maybe you’ll see Canada’s own Pat Kiernan doing one last sad loop around the ice (Sunday)
10. Stuntwoman Zoë Bell, of Deathproof fame is coming to Videology to watch her new movie, Raze with you. But you can probably ask her about Quentin Tarantino too (Sunday)
11. The Paper Box is holding another Typhoon Haiyan relief event, and this time Pharoe Monch and Rebel Diaz are going to be there. Pharoe Monch! Where’s he been? (Sunday)