1. Eight of Swords is hosting Fragmented Being, a sculpture exhibition that’s perfect for your fragmented mind. Plus, after the art comes the after party! (Friday)
2. Babeland knows you’ve got sex on the brain, so they’ll give you snacks, cocktails and their favorite sex tips, so that maybe your Valentine’s Day isn’t a bitter disappointment. Again (Friday)
3. Bearded troublemakers Gunfight! and Japanese rockers The Suzan are getting together in Bushwick for a rollicking evening of music and also sake bombs. When’s the last time you did a sake bomb? (Friday)
4. Reggae group The Big Takeover is taking over the Knitting Factory for their record release party. But in a nice way, they’re just playing music (Friday)
5. Learn about the new landscape of electronic music at the Mixology Festival at Roulette. We know, mixology, and not about drinks, how weird (Friday and Saturday)
6. Design and press your very own original Valentine’s Day card for your special lady the old fashioned way at the Brooklyn Navy Yard’s Letterpress Workshop (Saturday)
7. Or spend an afternoon crafting with a yogurt company. How many times can you say you’ve done that? (Saturday)
8. Hey girl, Videology wants to sit down and watch The Notebook with you. Plus they’ve got chocolate and a free charm for you too, because they know how hard you work out there (Saturday)
9. Learn the art of bookbinding so that you can put your own memoir together after you’ve written it. It’ll cut down on publishing costs (Saturday)
10. Party with Housing Works, and enjoy some free food and drinks, enter some raffles and shop for sweet thrift store deals at their Buy the Bag Warehouse (Saturday)
11. The weather is doing its best to keep you indoors, so take revenge on it by actually enjoying yourself at this month’s Saturday Revenge Party at Don Pedro (Saturday)
12. Find the perfect Valentine’s Day gift, or at least the best one you’re gonna find, at the Greenpointers Valentine’s Market (Sunday)
13. Freddy’s Bar is hosting a gluten-free pop-up shop, in case you were curious what kimchi grilled cheese tastes like. Or you might actually be allergic to gluten and are therefore finally getting the day you deserve (Sunday)
14. If you know a lot about Photoshop, but not all that you could, why not take a free advanced Photoshop class at the Mac Support Store? It could lead to you making the next image macro to set the internet on fire (Sunday)
15. Watch a bunch of comedians try to guess what a professor in an obscure field of study does at a taping of live podcast You’re the Expert. Should be a sedate, respectful evening (Sunday)
16. Simply Unemployable is a sketch and improv show you should really be able to relate to. Because you love sketch comedy, not because no one will hire you (Sunday)