1. Learn to make macrame plant holders, for all those plants you own, at Brooklyn Launchpad (Monday)
2. Or head to St. Vitus and learn what life is like for a black woman who spends her life hanging out in the metal scene, a subject Laina Dawes wrote a book about. Wonder if she thinks Slayer rules? (Monday)
3. Head to Branded, drink a couple beers, hang out with the Riders Alliance and make plans to put pressure on the MTA for better service after you’ve head a couple more beers (Tuesday)
4. Triangle man fights particle man in a lyrical smack down as They Might Be Giants play a free show at Academy Records (Tuesday)
5. The Secret Science Club hosts a presentation straight out of your nightmares as a crocodile expert talks about the evolution (and probable eventual world domination) of the unstoppable killing machines. Also how they’e different from alligators (Tuesday)
6. The L is again on the hunt for NYC’s best short fiction at The Literary Upstart competition, so go to Powerhouse and see who’s smashing paradigms, or at least hitting them really really hard (Wednesday)
7. Greenlight Books celebrates World Book Day a week early with some of their favorite authors reading from their favorite books. You got a book something for World Book Day, right? (Wednesday)
8. Dale Radio closes out another season of live podcasts without any fatalities at Film Biz Recycling. Way to go, guys! (Thursday)
9. Hulk Hogan performs a vicious leg drop on good taste at Videology, when they show the forgotten, uh, classic, No Holds Barred (Thursday)
10. It’s 4/19, got 1440 minutes? There probably won’t be lame jokes like at at the release party for Alfred Ryan Nerz’ Marijuanamerica, but maybe there will be? (Friday)