$500/month rent in Carroll Gardens! But there’s a catch or two

We’ve been talking abut New York’s apartment scene a lot lately, because it’s always fun to do that, but also because it contains so many absurdities. Never is this more apparent than when you’re desperately checking Craigslist to find a sublet that is affordable and not one of those “seeking a quiet foreign non-smoking student” ads. A tipster dropped off something off in our email that she came across while looking for a place. It’s a dream in price and location (Carroll Gardens! $500/month!) but is not-so-much a dream in every other way.

$500 / 800ft² – looking for roommate (cobble hill)

I live in a two bedroom apartment. I am looking for a someone to share my room with me, so I can maximize the rest of the space in the apartment. I love to dance, so I plan on clearing the rest of the apartment of furniture and putting most of it in the big bedroom. Then there will be a lot of space to dance with my new roommatein the rest of the apartment (tap, jazz, ballet, hip-hop). So you should be willing to share a bed with me (I have a king sized air mattress, so we won’t be crowding each other). And dance with me.Male or female. I smoke cigarettes, but only in the bedroom so the apartment doesn’t stink. And I have four himalayan cats that I love so so much that live only in the bedroom too. I expect you to be respectful, nice and quiet, a cat lover andabove all a good dancer. I do not have a job, so I will be home almost all of the time. I expect you to pitch in and clean half the time and also cook around half of the meals. I am a vegan on raw veg diet.I will of course usually allow you to invite guests over if you clear it with me ahead of time. I will expect you to keep me posted daily as to developments in your life so we don’t become total strangers. Cats a plus. Smokers OK. Please don’t bring furniture or too much stuff. I have plenty of clothes you can borrow so no need to go overboard.