The best tweets of Election Day 2013

"Honey, what do you think Sal Albanese is doing right now?" via Facebook — “Honey, what do you think Sal Albanese is doing right now?” via Facebook

So, we did it. We had an election last night. Way to go everyone, democratic changeover in governance without any violence, and just one grumpy short guy calling people racist. After you voted (you did vote, right?), there wasn’t much to do but sit around and wait to see if we’d end up with a runoff or not. We…didn’t? Not at the moment? Of course, waiting around for the results is only made more fun thanks to Twitter and everyone shooting out 15 jokes per second about all this wacky stuff, so let’s take a look at some of the best tweets of the night.

NYC politics bestows such gifts on us: an unintelligible grocery store magnate, a serial johnson dangler, a prostie-lover, a cat murderer

— Ben White (@morningmoneyben) September 11, 2013

Sorry Anthony, no one did it better than John Starks. http://t.co/2IST6Gdvpo — Andrew Krucoff (@krucoff) September 11, 2013

This night should end with a soused Michael Bloomberg telling us all to go fuck ourselves. — southpaw (@nycsouthpaw) September 11, 2013

Wait a second, if the whole Catsimatidis family is there… QUICK LOOT ALL THE GRISTEDES NOBODY’S WATCHING

— David Weiner (@daweiner) September 11, 2013

I feel like Joe Lhota should be telling us to be safe at the prom and that today is B schedule.

— Richard Lawson (@rilaws) September 11, 2013

I will say this about De Blasio: he gets things done. After Sandy the broken pavement in front of his house was repaired QUICKLY. — F’D in Park Slope (@effedparkslope) September 11, 2013

Wow, if you’re looking for Weiner’s speech online, STRONG recommendation you do not Google “anthony weiner stream.” — Jeb Lund (@Mobute) September 11, 2013

Weiner and Spitzer lost, but are free to party tonight.

— Josh Greenman (@joshgreenman) September 11, 2013

There is some questionable dancing going on to this FUN song on the @deBlasioNYC stage right now

— Andrew J. Hawkins (@andyjayhawk) September 11, 2013

You know how every time it’s pouring rain and you finally make it down the subway stairs and step right into a giant fucking puddle? Lhota. — Allison Benedikt (@abenedikt) September 11, 2013

Seeing that picture of Weiner flicking off reporters, I worry about his impulse control. — Philip Bump (@pbump) September 11, 2013

Weiner finally addressed the elephant in the room: his enthusiasm for parades

— Alex Pareene (@pareene) September 11, 2013

Majority of 17 NYC Republicans Pleased With Result

— Stefan Becket (@stefanjbecket) September 11, 2013

Oh man this “3 more weeks” chant is not inspiring. — Michael Roston (@michaelroston) September 11, 2013

The man who sprinted through a McDonald’s tonight, to avoid somebody with whom he texted penis pictures, has more votes than Joe Lhota. — Matt Pearce (@mattdpearce) September 11, 2013