Do you carry on cooking despite the fact that last time you made a meal for your friends they all just up and died? Well, first lawyer up. But make sure that lawyer has some entertainment industry experience, because you could be the perfect cast member for the Food Network’s Worst Cooks in America, which is currently casting for their fifth season.
Sadly, the show isn’t a celebration of people’s terrible cooking, which we think would be fun, but is rather a competition where chefs (Anne Burrell, super-chef Bobby Flay) take teams of incompetents and get them to actually cook like human beings instead of pretty smart dogs. So it’s like Top Chef except people congratulate you for things like not burning down the kitchen and correctly understanding that combining milk and orange juice is pretty gross.
Anyway, if you’re really really bad at cooking, and don’t mind showing it off for the deceptive editing of reality TV, send an email to worstcooksnyc [at] gmail.com. In the email, include your name, age, your hometown, where you live now, some contact info and finally, why you’re the worst cook in America. Or why someone you know is. That’s right, you can nominate a friend for this. Just wait for that phone call, mystery bad cook. You know who you are.
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Oh, I am totally getting in on this. All I need is a zoot suit, a big hat, and my own custom pool cue in a case. "Man, I really am an awful cook. Wanna drop some cash on it?"