1. Can’t go home for the holidays to play games with your family? Do the next best thing and listen to comedians talk about their favorites at Spike Hill (Monday)
2. John Podhoretz sits down to explain that while the goyim vote like this (“A deedle doo do da”), Jews vote like this (“A deedle doo do da oy vey”) (Tuesday)
3. A yoga studio holiday party means lots of soused, attractive people. Soused, attractive, bendy people. Have fun (Tuesday)
4. “Choirfly” claims to be Brooklyn’s nerdiest a capella group. Which we know there’s tons of competition, but maybe they’ll do the kinda embarrassing Firefly theme and show they really deserve the crown (Wednesday)
5. Cookies and hot chocolate and National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation: all totally American. Except this is Mexican and at a taqueria, so it’s better (Wednesday)
6. You have that ugly sweater anyway, so why not head to Alaska to try to be crowned Bushwick’s Queen of Ugly Sweaters? Do you not want a hefty bar tab? (Thursday)
7. It’s the second-to-last night on Earth. Spend it workshopping you short story to completion, because you’ll be too busy partying/weeping tomorrow (Thursday)
8. If you still haven’t listened to klezmer music, Avi Fox-Rosen can make sure you do before Earth winks out of existence (Friday)
9. With the world hours away from ending, if it hasn’t already, Powerhouse on 8th hosts some writers to talk about how they want it to end (Friday)
10. Christmas feeling a little too nice? Get a little Christmas Evil in at Videology (Friday)