Hey all you totally cool dudes in your flannel and you rad girls wearing cut-off jeans with tights under them, you love soda, right? How about we all sit down and rap about the new Imagine Dragons album and argue about whether or not The Lumineers or Mumford and Sons are a better band while drinking some Caleb’s Kola? It’s totally unaffiliated with any PepsiCo products, because we here at Caleb’s Kola know that big soda is lame (kids still say “lame,” right?).
No, no, you don’t have to research that or anything, we’re just a bunch of hip millennials talking jive about soda and our favorite bands, without ever thinking about how #brands keep trying to hide themselves behind “artisan” and “craft” labels. We here at Caleb’s Kola know you, we mean us, us crazy kids, love spelling things the wrong way and not listening to our parents.
So while they’re doing doing something wack like buying Coca-Cola-brand soda product, we’re all gonna head to New York-area Costcos and get some Caleb’s Kola, which again, has nothing to do with PepsiCo and our, we mean their, their desperate attempts to win back millennials to their liquid poison! Yes, we’re just a bunch of carefree millennials not worrying about things like sugar intake or diabetes and instead are worrying about products we feel are authentic. #honorincraft!