1. Head to Book Court for a reading from a book about the Beach Boys’ history as a touring band. Should be a real mental health issues surfin’ safari! (Friday)
2. Learn everything you’ve ever wanted to know about oysters, but were afraid to ask, at 3rd Ward. But why were you afraid to ask questions about oysters? (Friday)
3. Rooftop Films hosts a screening of i hate myself :), a film about self-loathing in the style of a home movie. So kinda like watching your home movies, but with more bad sex (Friday)
4. Williamsburg’s Soft Spot is having a party because they’re turning eight. This is the age around when they stop being cute (Friday)
5. The Brick Theater invites you to stop by and play games with people thousands of miles away from you, thanks to the magic of digital communication. Not World of Warcraft, some kinda arty game (Saturday)
6. Pilot robots and tiny boats down the Gowanus Canal, for science (Saturday)
7. Babeland invites you in to cool off with some complimentary ice pops from People’s Pops that you can eat suggestively while browsing during their customer appreciation sale (Saturday)
8. Music Frees All is a festival that clearly believes in the idea of “Free your mind and your ass will follow.” Why else would they book acts like Antibalas and Prince Paul? (Saturday)
9. It’s Garbage Day at Videology, as some expert curators of VHS crap answer the question, “What if Robocop was in Judas Priest?” (Saturday)
10. Detroit soul legend Spyder Turner is coming to Littlefield to funky up your life. Here’s his version of “Stand by Me.” Good, huh? (Saturday)
11. Ian Curits may have shuffled off this mortal coil, but there’s no reason the Grand Victory can’t throw him a birthday party. Don’t act all happy though, he’d hate that (Saturday)
12. Sweden gets a lot of love around here, what with Ikea and Brooklyn Brewery, but Danish restaurant Dassara wants you to celebrate Denmark for a day. Who are we to turn up our noses? (Sunday)
13. Tiki Disco heads to Rippers for a rollicking beach day at the Rockaways. We recommend taking the NYC Beach Bus down there because it’s fast, cheap and now comes with FREE Sixpoint (Sunday)
14. Presentation Party Night wants to teach you about a bunch of things. Things like lasers! (Sunday)
15. Help send Brooklyn grunge rockers Galapagos Now! to Europe by hanging out at their album listening party at the Brazen Head. Not for good, just a tour (Sunday)
16. It’s time for Bullshit History again, the competition in which you try to convince people the Kaiser stole the word “twenty,” and other made up historical factoids (Sunday)
17. Hump some sweaters and rub mud on your ass at the Canal Bar, while they show Wet Hot American Summer. The two things are unrelated though (Sunday)