If it seems like just a year ago that Vogue was calling Bushwick “disfavored” and talking about how it was so impossible to get there because even the train full of poors doesn’t put you where you want, well you’re right, it has just been a year. Still, so much changes in a year and if you’re going to suck the essence of youth dry, you have to keep up with said youth, so Vogue now says “Time to hop on the L!” because Bushwick is the 7th coolest neighborhood in the whole world.
You read that right. Bushwick is so cool now, there are only six neighborhoods in the entire world that are cooler than Bushwick. If you actually look at Vogue‘s writeup, a slurry of hype words poured into a size 0 mold (“Roberta’s!” “Jay-Z!” “galleries!” “vinyl!”) and served up for people for whom taking the subway is an exotic adventure.
Aside from getting a morally hazardous restaurant, the Vogue writeup makes it kind of impossible to figure out what makes Bushwick so cool as opposed to so previously disfavored, except for the fact that no one stopped going to Bushwick after Vogue‘s previous slight. It’s almost like the very nature of “cool” is a construct with seemingly no meaning, an artifice meant to cover up for the fact that people allegedly making decisions are actually are just blindly following a crowd they’re purporting to lead, hoping and praying to whatever empty deity they believe in that they won’t fuck it all up.
Anyway, Bushwick is cool.
Follow Dave, who’s a really cool guy at @DaveCoIon