Wear your stretchy pants, or no pants.

1. The Dirty Water Dogs will be howling some funk and zydeco tunes at Bar Chord. (Friday)

2. Mark Andrew Ferguson talks about the young, lost, and heartbroken as the BookCourt launch of his novel The Lost Boys Symphony. (Friday)

3. Bring your two left feet to Dance Fever Studios and become the master salsero you always know you were. (Saturday)

4. Friday is 20 years old, so pour some water in your cereal and get over to The Bell House to Party Like It’s 1995.

5. Do some drinking and some drawing at The Way Station, because god gave you two hands for a reason. (Saturday)

6. Watch Jo Firestone, Tom Cowell, and other comics work through their adolescent trauma with sketches, poetry and video at The Bitch Seat at Union Hall. (Saturday)

7. See hip-hop duo Dälek off at Over the Eight before they go take Europe by storm. (Saturday)

8. Get inspired and inebriated at Videology’s Drunk TED Talks. (Saturday)

9. Bring your Tinder date dancings at A/S/L at Friends and Lovers. (Saturday)

10. Learn alternative polaroid processing techniques, because sometimes you just don’t want to shake it. (Sunday)

11. Celebrate 50 years of the city’s landmarks preservation law with a landmark tour of Green-Wood Cemetery. (Sunday)

12. Go to Regina Opera’s 45th Anniversary performance, if only to see what an amazing arrangement of “Happy Birthday” they have in store. (Sunday)

13. Fried chicken doesn’t get enough parties dedicated to it, so dance to live music at Sycamore Bar in honor of your favorite artery assailant. (Sunday)

14. Eat your plant-based heart out at the Vegan Cook-Off: Comfort Food Edition at littlefield. (Sunday)

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