One of your Oscars jokes was retweeted by Julie Klausner, you can offer incisive commentary bordering on insults for The Bachelor and your failed sitcom knowledge is second-to-none. Yet you’re still pretty anonymous and fall asleep every night wondering how to become a part of the crew of people that get paid to make up the big, collective, snarkily critical voice of the Internet, The A.V. Club has answered your bedtime prayers: they’re looking for new (paid!) contributors, and are open to anyone.
Blogging is a great job. You can do it at home, you can do it in your underwear. You can even do it while drinking beer. But it’s all about who you’re doing it for.
Anyone who spends their workday scrolling through pop culture columns and blogs (we see you!) will probably eventually come to the conclusion that they could do this crap themselves. So put your typing hands where your mouth is, and get busy. The folks at The A.V. Club want to know what you can contribute to “Newswire” and “Great Job, Internet.” Qualified candidates must have an innate ability to find stuff worth talking about (you’re halfway there), and then sound good talking about it.
Anyone who spends their workday scrolling through pop culture columns and blogs also probably has the tendency to pick up the voice that they’re reading. The A.V. Club doesn’t want you to do that. They don’t care about résumés or clips, they want to know what you can do for them. Just be yourself and hope that you’re not boring. You have until next Tuesday to email your clever take on either Newswire or Great Job, Internet to avcontests [at] theonion.com.