Maybe one reason why people don’t get out there and register to vote (hey here’s some reasons why you should) is that registering to vote just seems so old-fashioned. “Keep your pencils and crap away from me, grandpa,” Milennials are all out there saying, “I just wanna stay home and Snapchat nude pics with Google Glass. YOLO.” Now those lousy kids have one less excuse to not register, because New York City will let you register to vote on your spacephone, with its new app, NYC Votes.
The web app, which is totally free and doesn’t even require a download, will take you through every step of the voting registration process, up to the virtual registration process. After that you get shunted over to the DMV, who handles the final act of registering you, but if you don’t want do that you can get the forms mailed to you.
The site even chides you on how many days you have left to register to vote, like that mother you never call would. The app will also give you information on candidates running for local office, their websites and social media pages, though right now it only has candidates running for mayor. But it has every candidate, including weird joke ones you’ve never heard of. Eventually the app will also let you donate money to the candidate of your choice, so you can add that to the dangers your cell phone poses to you’re when drunk. Though unlike a mewling pathetic booty call to an ex, who can blab to everyone, someone will have to do some serious research through public records to find out you donated $50 to Jack Hidary.
Keep in mind that you still need to leave the house to vote, so do that, so that we don’t have to look at another map like this one with a deep sense of shame in four years.