12/19/14 11:51am
i am santa claus

Mick Foley and Santa Claus will help make your Christmas a little less lonely, as long as you have Netflix

They say it’s the most wonderful time of the year, which is undoubtedly true if you have a goofy sweater wearing, hot cocoa drinking, Christmas carol singing, adorable family to go home to. But if like me you are among those who can’t – or choose not to – leave the best borough in the world over the holidays, whether you’re fond of Christmas or not, the expectation that it will be a somehow significant and special time can be quite annoying.

As an affirmed boycotter and Christmas orphan (perhaps more commonly referred to as “The Product Of Divorce”), over the years I’ve developed several tactics to keep myself distracted and entertained. (more…)

12/18/14 9:13am
Oh stop it you

Oh stop it you

1. Ho Ho Ha is Pine Box Rock Shop’s present to you, a free variety show featuring comedy, dancing, and videos. (Friday)

2. TK Wonder has opened for Nas, Erykah Badu, and Talib Kweli, and is playing at Glasslands this weekend. (Friday)

3. If you haven’t watched Love Actually nine times already this month, and even if you have, go see it at Videology. (Friday) (more…)

12/11/14 11:00am
If you come at the Kings County, you better now miss.

You come at the Kings County, you best not miss.

Years ago while working at Trader Joe’s, I saw my friend D get in a tiff with another girl, both of them native Brooklynites. After the fight, D walked over to me and said, “That girl must be from Williamsburg or something because she is HARD.”  She was of course speaking of the historical Williamsburg, once known as a rough-and-raw high-crime area, not so much the home of jokes about skinny jeans and PBR it had become. Of course, even in the years since that tiff, the fear in the neighborhood has changed: people don’t worry so much about being mugged, or being plowed under by a penny farthing, they worry that they’ve accidentally wandered into Midtown East, thanks to the chain-washing of Jay Crew, Urbo Outties, Hole Foods, Starsbuck and now an off-brand Microsoft store.

We can only guess it is this latest iteration that most terrifies Brooklyn native Michael K. Williams, who played Omar on The Wire, Albert “Chalky” White on Boardwalk Empire and now lives in Williamsburg. He said to the New Yorker this week, of the neighborhood: ““Sometimes, when I see, you know, antics on the weekend, I’d feel safer in the Vanderveer projects, where I grew up.” (more…)

12/10/14 3:42pm
death by audio vice

Apparently this was not appreciated. Photo by David Colon

Ever since the world learned that Vice was taking over most of the block that housed Death By Audio, Glasslands, 285 Kent, indiescreen and the Muse, there’s been a little bit of tension between the media company and the DIY world. That and 10,000 “Isn’t THIS ironic?” jokes. Vice has remained mostly silent in the face of people complaining about them taking over the block, but an interview on Bedford + Bowery with DBA’s Edan Wilber in which he claimed that the venue wasn’t bought out was apparently a bridge too far for Vice, who, along with DBA’s landlord told BrooklynVegan a starkly different version of events. (more…)

12/09/14 10:13am
williamsburg apple store

Probably won’t be like the Monolith, it might be. via Flickr user Justin Brown

The Williamsburg Apple Store is a concept that’s haunted gentrified Williamsburg like a spectre, with every bar, business and venue closure starting rumors anew that THIS would be the place where the Apple Store was going. Well, we can finally stop treating it like a ghost story, because the New York Post reports that an Apple Store is opening on the corner of North 3rd Street and Bedford Avenue. At least now if you break your phone at a show at Glasslands you can just stroll over and get it fixed. Oh wait. (more…)

12/08/14 10:37am
Go make Snoopy proud.

Go make Snoopy proud.

1. Franklin Park Reading Series is having their end of the year bash with a little help from some of the year’s best fiction and essay writers. (Monday)

2. Get some real laughs in with Side Ponytail before you have to fake chuckle your way through your uncle’s awful jokes at those holiday dinners. (Monday)

3. Mark the royal visit to New York with free White Castle at Devour Hour. (Tuesday) (more…)

12/05/14 3:41pm
muppet christmas

Spending some time this Christmas season with the Muppets at Union Hall is just one of the many ways to enjoy the season this year

Santa was ushered into Macy’s at the conclusion of the Thanksgiving Day parade, thus officially signaling the beginning of another holiday season. There’s no denying that New York City in December is breathtakingly beautiful. The holiday markets, ice rinks, display windows, the omnipresent smell of evergreens in the air… and ahh yes, the herds of tourists. Want to avoid the crowds and subsequently becoming a Grinch? Stay in Brooklyn for all seasonal festivities. Whether you’re a Buddy the Elf or an Ebenezer Scrooge, Brokelyn has your one-stop holiday guide for fun and festive happenings in your favorite borough, all under $30. (more…)

12/05/14 10:06am
big brooklyn holiday toy drive

Every kid deserves a visit from Santa. via Facebook

As you know all too well, the holiday season is here, a time of year to be especially mindful of those around us who could use our help. If you’re looking for a way to help brighten the holidays for local kids in need, the Big Brooklyn Holiday Toy Drive is an excellent opportunity. Last year’s event collected over 1,500 toys, and this year’s toy drive is bigger than ever. Sponsored by Brooklyn businesses and organizations, the toy drive is looking for unwrapped toys, stuffed animals, or games appropriate for kids under the age of 15 through December 15. And if you were on the fence for some reason, yes, there’s something in it for you. Namely, free drinks. (more…)

12/04/14 3:32pm
south 4th bar

Celebrate with these goofs. via Facebook

Given how suddenly difficult it’s become to keep any fun places in Williamsburg open, we should be holding on to the places that are left as tight as we can. One of these spots? The South 4th Bar, which we love for many reasons, chief among them being that they are among the most welcoming neighborhood bars we can think of. Tonight’s an especially good night to experience South 4th’s friendly welcome, because they’re celebrating their 8th birthday with a party where you get free beer. (more…)

12/04/14 10:31am
Toss the pigskin around before you see it, maybe

Toss the pigskin around before you see it, maybe

1. The Disposable Film Festival at Videology features movies made with everyday camera equipment that could be made by any yutz off the street, like you!  (Friday)

2. Or check out a film festival with work with fancier film equipment as the Brooklyn Filmmakers Collective presents short films at Screen/Sounds (Friday)

3. You’re gonna be doing a lot of unhealthy eating this season, so it’s important to do things like dance like a lunatic at funk parties like The Mess Around (Friday) (more…)