Bike date, anyone?

Just in time for the worst holiday of all time, the folks at L Magazine have compiled a list of 18 Brooklyn Dates: One For Every Conceivable Dating Scenario. Among these suggested evenings of passion are The Art Date (hit up some art galleries and toss back some PBRs), The Roof Date (WINE ON THA ROOF!), The Let’s Make Dinner Date, which honestly, this lady loves going on solo too, and, on that note, The Treat-Yourself Date for the Single Person, which includes a visit to my absolute favorite heart-break therapy spot, Buffalo Exchange.

What L Magazine refers to as “The Broke Date” is right up this Brokelynite’s alley and includes a free Saturday tour at the Brooklyn Brewery, cheap Mexican eats at Tortilleria Mexicana Los Hermanos in Bushwick and finishes with a cozy beerfest (or winefest) on the couch. So no more excuses, dudes; who says Valentine’s Day has to be extravagant?

For the full list of 18 proposed dates, head over to L Magazine.

Ah the finer things.

Whether it’s actually a thing that more women have discovered whiskey lately or just one of those pseudo-trend stories, we’ll let you decide. But let it be known, ladies, that ordering a glass of whiskey totally works for you, so you should keep doing it. On that note, All you dudes and ladies who love a taste of whiskey, prepare for an awesome pre-V day outing: New Greenpoint gallery/shop The One Well is hosing a whiskey and chocolate tasting on Thursday, and it’s free! From 6-8pm, sample drinks from Jonathan Wingo from The Whiskey Shop and chocolates from Danielle Lawrence of Raaka Chocolate. The shop will be offering package pricing on vintage glasses with the purchase of a bottle of whiskey, too.

The One Well,  165 Greenpoint Ave., Greenpoint. 

Ghenet means "Yes, I'll sleep with you but not until you wash your hands" in Ethiopian. Photo by Serious Eats.

Dear Serious Eats web site, we hate slideshows, unless they’re celebrity plastic surgery photos. Love, Brokelyn.
Formatting quibbles aside, check out Serious Eats’ list of 10 modestly priced Valentine’s Day restaurants, which include three in Brooklyn (Olea, Cafe Moto and the “sensually” utensil-free Ghenet). There’s also one in Staten Island (the ferry’s romantic, even if mac and cheese isn’t.) Down at Broketown HQ, we’ve been debating the merits of acknowledging Valentine’s Day at all, with single dudes some of us staunchly opposed and married breeders others looking for any excuse to break out the bubbly and cupid-festooned Joe Boxers… ROAR! Whatever your plans (we’re actually curious, so feel free to pipe in), these places seem worth a visit at some point. Or are you single dudes down on restaurants altogether these days? [via Serious Eats]

Can you get your flirt on? Photo via Flickr's Nylons and Cake.

The good thing about going to a flirting workshop is that it’s probably a pretty damn good place to pick up a date, especially for you, the person who’s bad at flirting, because you’ll be in a room with other people who suck at flirting, which means your attempts to pick them up will be even more aww-dorable. Tonight, Babeland is holding a mini workshop on flirting to give you tips on eye contact, body language, suggestive conversation starters and tips for taking it a step further. The workshop is only about 20 minutes long, but, think about it: you’re in a flirting workshop. In a sex shop. A week before Valentine’s Day. If you can’t hook up there, you probably need to go back to remedial sex ed.
7pm tonight at Babeland Brooklyn, 462 Bergen St., Park Slope.

[via the skint]

Not the actual tree.

Screw it, we’ll just go all out for Valentine’s Day stuff today, even though us singles think it’s about as real a holiday as the Verdukian Holiday of Mouth Pleasures: You could spend tons on an overrated restaurant, followed by weak cocktails, followed by, I don’t know what you couples are into these days, flowers or something? Lame. Step up the game this year by putting all that money in one place and dedicating a whole tree in Prospect Park to your lurver, which will help replace all the ones destroyed by storms last year. For $75, you can plant a sapling as part of the restoration project; for $100, you can contribute to a communal Arbor Day Tree, which also gets you an invite to a special planting ceremony on April 27. Each one gets you a special Valentine’s Day certificate, but orders have to be in by noon on Feb. 9 to ensure you get it in time. Visit the park’s site for ordering details. Then maybe your partner will make like a tree and … oh never mind.

[via Windsor Terrace blog]

Love don't come for free. Comedy does.

By now, you should know the Tea Lounge holds weekly fun and free events every Tuesday night, including a story telling night hosted by our friend Kerri Doherty from sass-mouthed nabe blog F’d in Park Slope. But a terrible thing happens in February! There’s no show on Feb. 14! Sources tell us this might be because they are creating a holiday out of the Garry Marshall movie for that day. If true, we will report back with a list of cheap things to do that day, if you’re of the coupling variety. Until then, enjoy free comedy and storytelling shows, including guest storyteller Ted Travelstead of Vanity Fair  — and maybe you can holler at some non-baby holding singles in the Lounge while you’re there. (more…)

Today Google Offers has a deal for half off a BYOB painting class at Painting Lounge in Williamsburg. The two-hour class is only $25, as opposed to the  usual $50, including supplies and the finished painting you get to take home. We’ve never been to this joint, but Painting Lounge has scads of love letters on Yelp (which you should always check because an alarming number of places on those deal sites sound worse than Gitmo.) Painting Lounge also has an unusual approach: they teach you to copy master paintings, which are posted on this here calendar. Sounds like a fun birthday gift / wedding present (especially if you include the booze) / Valentine’s Day date. (Paging Mr. Brokelyn!) Get the Painting Lounge deal here.

I chicken heart you.

Did you know that the annual day of love and tasteless chocolates also shares its calendar space with National Donor Day? Since 1998, the day calls upon kind-hearted individuals to register as donors for the more than 100,000 people currently awaiting transplants (If you’re feeling lovingly altruistic, fill out your donor cards). And what better way to strengthen your registered organs than with organ-based meals? A rational line of thinking, perhaps not, but logic aside, you can indulge your inner Andrew Zimmern today with some (tasty?) edible offals offered by an international line up of Brooklyn restaurants. You might be hesitant (no judgement) but at such low prices what do you really have to lose (except your appetite)? (more…)

Pumps. That'll teach your ex.

Going to a strip club is probably not at the top of your list of things to do on Valentine’s Day. As we all know, though, luck runs out, bad things happen to good people, and so forth, and a little escapism may be what you need to mend a broken heart or fragile ego. Maybe you’re bored and want to entertain that urge to go to a sleazy place with your bros but haven’t mustered up the courage/desperation until now. Or maybe you’re just looking for a cheap lunch. Whatever the reason, here are three places to get your fix without losing your shirt (in the bad way) in the process. (more…)

Dating in Brooklyn couldn’t be more awkward/fickle/sociopathic/on-the-internet, and Feb. 14th is just the day to be excruciatingly self-aware of this. There’s nary a more self-loathing celebration, but the slew of single-people happenings next week will surely lure you back from the ledge. Brokelyn is here to weed out the pricey events and serve up some anti-V-day haterade in the $0-10 range. And since the events start on a Monday, pour me a haterade double. (more…)