03/17/17 5:01pm
Imagine never having to play human Tetris again. Photo via Wiki

Imagine never having to play human Tetris again. Photo via Wiki

This Sunday, the fare for weekly and monthly MetroCards will go up respectively to $32 (from $31) and $121 (from $116.50). There will also be a variety of other cuts impacting the “round trip bonus” which is that thing the MTA pretends is a seductive incentive to put more money on a MetroCard but is really more confusing than it is beneficial and leaves you with an awkward amount of money on your card, as well as the 7-day express bus plus card. (more…)

01/13/16 2:43pm
We have bigger subway problems than this little face. Via Flickr user TK.

We have bigger subway problems than this little face. Via Flickr user Seth Werkheiser.

These days it seems that we just can’t agree on anything. Did Steve Avery really do it or was he set up? Should we go to that one mediocre brunch spot we always go to, or that other mediocre brunch spot we sometimes to go? Now the issue of dogs on the subway is another of the countless things we can’t agree on. The New York Times focused an entire article on the topic earlier this week. MTA rules say a dog must be carried in an enclosed bag or container and “carried in a manner which would not annoy other passengers.” But a lot of folks regularly ignore that (or just don’t know it), and these people who bring their adorable furry friends to brighten up the underground misery should be rewarded, not slapped with a $25 fine. Here are 10 real subway problems that should be banned before we worry about dogs: (more…)

12/03/15 12:07pm
Toronto. via Flickr user Sean_Marshall

Well we know at least one person is a fan of the open gangway trains in Toronto. via Flickr user Sean_Marshall, edited by David Colon

The subways, as we know, are more crowded and delayed than ever. The MTA knows we won’t be mollified by cutesy 16-bit videos explaining why everything is broken, so they’re looking for different solutions to get more of us on trains. One option? Per Second Avenue Sagas, the MTA put aside money to buy 10 open gangway cars, also known as articulated trains, in their 2015-2019 capital plan. (more…)

07/14/15 2:52pm

While not every experience in New York City is a universal one, everyone with working ears who’s ridden the subway has heard the mellifluous voice that calmly asks you to please stand clear of the closing doors. Even on the C train, which gets some upgraded trains in the summers. Is there a person behind the voice? Or is it a clever machine? It turns out that voice does belong to a human, a man named Charlie Pellett, who “literally shares your pain” whenever the announcement he recorded about an unavoidable delay is played, because he’s probably on the train too. (more…)

07/08/15 4:10pm
Come on, man. Photo by Jennifer Shaw

Come on, man. Photo by Jennifer Shaw

From tipster Jennifer Shaw, behold a grievous violation of subway etiquette. We understand that we had a brief apocalypse today, but we don’t think it was dire enough to violate the idea that you shouldn’t bring something one step down from a damn motorcycle on the D train. Shaw told us that she came across the subway scooter when she got on the train at Broadway-Lafayette this afternoon, and the owner rolled it off the train when it got to Atlantic Avenue.

“I was hoping he’d get off at my stop so I could watch him try and get it down the stairs, but no such luck,” she told us, while also noting that there wasn’t much of a reaction but that it probably would have been a thing if it had been a busier time of day. (more…)

06/24/15 1:21pm

Manspread! Most are in agreement that it’s a bad thing. Boo! Hiss! Shake your fist at the manspreaders and even at the word itself. As with any societal ill though, there’s another side to the equation, and finally someone (comedian Mark Malkoff) has spoken to some men (more comedians) about why they sit spread out in the subway. Turns out that they suffer from a genetic abnormality known as “manspreaditis,” which beyond being a medically inaccurate term*, causes its sufferers to always have their legs in an exaggerated, spread out position.

No matter where you fall on the manspread debate, everyone should be able to admit that from the men gamely clomping down subway stairs in an almost crab walk to the men all trying to hug in a circle with their legs spread out, this is some impressive physical comedy.

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06/22/15 2:28pm
Be prepared to think of this exact image if you're trying to take the A/C train this summer. Flickr image via MTA

Be prepared to think of this exact image if you’re trying to take the A/C train this summer. Flickr image via MTA

We told you that this day would come, seriously we did, back in November. Today, we learned that the hilariously named Cranberry Tube (which connects Manhattan and Brooklyn via the A/C lines) will be shutting down for 40 non-consecutive weekends starting July 11. According to the Daily News, “there will be 12 weekend closures through November 14, diverting the trains to the F train tracks between the Jay Street-MetroTech and W. 4th Street stations.” So if you happen to be traveling on the two of three blue line trains any given weekend, you should check your transit app, so you don’t end up going through the East Village, when you actually want to go to Tribeca. (more…)

03/20/15 4:18pm

Sorry, you’ll probably be waiting for a while. via Flickr user Chris Ford

The L train stirs some mighty special feelings inside us. Part of us loves it for the tremendous people watching potential. Williamsburg and Bushwick have some of the most fascinating creatures we’ve encountered, and we feel like there are many anthropology dissertations to be written on it. A bigger part, though, wants to curl up into a ball and cry and roll and cry whenever we think of the L train, especially now that it’s undergoing some sort of dramatic rebirth and not running at night for the next nine weeks. Annoyance Theatre hears our wimpers though, and they’re betraying their name by helping sooth your L train troubles. From now on, tickets to their shows will be buy one get one half off whenever the L train isn’t running. (more…)

03/19/15 11:00am
Probably a better option once your monthly runs out.

Probably a better option once your monthly runs out.

As the ugly MTA fare hike looms over us, we at Brokelyn have been looking through our couch cushions in desperate search of the monthly MetroCards we’ve been holding on to for when we get a “real” job that forces us to use the best/worst subway system in the world. Why? Because that obscenely-expensive $112 30-day card we bought after the last fare hike is going to be worth less than the Weimar Papiermark come March 29th.


03/17/15 10:22am
overcrowded subway

It doesn’t HAVE to be this way. via Flickr user Ianqui Doodle

Maybe it was this winter, maybe things are falling apart at the fast rate that things feel like they’re falling apart, but the subway being broken as hell has been a hot topic of late. The 7 train. The L train. Delays from massive overcrowding. Sure we got fancy new manspreading PSAs, but you need a working train before you have a manspreader to roll your eyes at. If you’ve been bitching about the state of your commute lately, we’re not gonna tell you to stop, but we will tell you to tell the Riders Alliance, who’s collecting stories to dump on Governor Cuomo’s doorstep as an argument for fully funding the MTA’s capital plan in this year’s budget. (more…)