02/14/14 1:51pm
Man, she did not like that valentine.

Man, she did not like that valentine.

As we learned yesterday, relationships crash and burn more often than they work out. If you’re currently unsatisfied and thinking of making a change in your life, you should at least be able to enjoy yourself after ending it with your formerly loved one. Or at least make it memorable for the both of you. And since we’re always here to serve, we’ve rounded up some of the best places for you to end your relationship. Happy Valentine’s Day! (more…)

07/10/13 4:20pm
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Avoid surreptitiously putting your unwrapped mattress far from your apartment thanks to IKEA. via Flickr user splorp

New mattress: a wonderful thing! With the only downside being that you need to do something with the old mattress. You could try giving it away on Craigslist, except people are getting wise to getting a mattress that way not being a great idea. If you don’t want to wrap it and drag it down the stairs yourself, good news: Ikea will take your mattress for you if you buy a new one from them. (more…)

05/30/13 2:00pm
Fun fact: cooked by the Swedish Chef. via Ikea

Fun fact: cooked by the Swedish Chef. via Ikea

How do you say “date night” in Swedish? “Datum natt.” And now that you know that, you can ask your boo if you she wants to have a datum natt at Ikea’s pretty fantastic looking buffet on June 14 at 6:30pm. Of course, if she does want to go, hope you guys like fish. Because there’s a whole lot of that. (more…)

04/02/13 1:38pm
Maybe give some to Occupy Sandy. via Facebook

Maybe give some to Occupy Sandy. via Facebook

So we’ve already got one way to argue over how to spend gobs of money, at least if you live in Brad Lander’s district and want to be part of his participatory budget-palooza. If you don’t live in Lander’s district, don’t get bummed out about not being able to spend huge amounts of money, because you’ve got two more chances in front of you. One, involves how Ikea should help Red Hook, and and the other is the big kahuna: how do we spend the money the federal government gave us after we clawed it out of their horrible hands. (more…)

03/19/13 9:20am
Although, we guess you can hang out at the bar while the person shops for you. via Flickr user Urban_Lisa

Although, we guess you can hang out at the bar while the person shops for you. via Flickr user Urban_Lisa

So we’ve previously covered how much it costs you to to shlep all your crap home from Ikea (both a useful guide AND a window into Tim’s hairstyle at the time). But we’ve also gotten sage relationship advice from cupcake genius Allison Robicelli that included a whole paragraph on not going to Ikea. Fortunately for you, Ikea has a way to avoid both the shlepping and the fighting, and still get your stuff, but of course, it’ll cost you. For $99, you can give them a list of all the stuff you want, and they’ll both buy it for you and deliver it to you. So, the question is, is the Picking with Delivery service worth it? (more…)

02/25/13 11:21am
A horse is a horse of course of course, unless it's a meatball

A horse is a horse of course of course, unless it’s a meatball

IKEA’s great for lots of things, like outfitting your room with duct-taped MALM dressers that fall apart as soon as a subway train rumbles under your building, or finding a Zooey Deschanel/Joseph Gordon-Levitt lookalike and re-enacting that scene from 500 Days of Summer. One of IKEA’s worst-kept, best secrets, though, is the retailer’s super cheap food, like dollar soft-serve ice cream and sweet, saucy frozen Swedish meatballs. But while we assumed the worst thing about those meatballs was our tendency to eat a whole bag in one sitting, we might have been wrong, because traces of horse meat were reportedly found in them in the Czech Republic. NO, BLACK BEAUTY, NO!!! (more…)

01/07/13 1:00pm
What else is there to say? Photo by Brooklyn Brewery.

What else is there to say? Photo by Brooklyn Brewery.

There’s not much crossflow in cultural knowledge between Brooklyn and Sweden. Thanks to them, we’ve got Vikings, Swedish Fish candies, meatballs, Ikea (obviously), and this one songwriting competition about the G train whose winner was sent to Sweden. It’s not a very extensive list, but now we have a big bragging right that we can tag onto it: the building of a Brooklyn Brewery in Stockholm. Hopefully they don’t take our champion, The Defender, with them. (more…)

11/21/12 7:30am

On Black Friday (only three more days!), these cute little Ikea Lack tables, which are usually a whopping $9.99, are on sale for a mere $4.99.  Their simplistic design makes it easy to customize them for unique holiday gift giving on the cheap. Who wouldn’t want an end table with your faced decoupaged on top? For helpful design hints, including a way to make a kitchen island or an ottoman out of your lack, check this out. Ikea, 1 Beard St. Red Hook. 

11/05/12 1:45pm

Best thing about having a job: lunch break. Photo by @newyorkpizzaco

We told you Sandy would create jobs. A tipster on Facebook sent us the following job opportunities at ConEd:

ConEdison has IMMEDIATE openings (900) for Safety Site Inspectors stationed in every borough. Duties to include placing yellow safety tape around areas with downed trees ensuring that the public stay away from trees or downed lines. Candidates must have their own vehicle, clean driver’s license and work boots. Shifts from 7AM – 7PM, and 7PM – 7AM paying $25 per hour. (Company will waive background checks).  (more…)

10/31/12 10:44am

Sandy washed this boat ashore just down the street from Ikea. Photo by The Atlantic.

Sandy did her best to bring the Hudson River to Red Hook, and as a result, Brooklyn is left without meatballs, umlaut-based furniture and a destination for fresh produce.

From the Ikea website:

IKEA Brooklyn will be closing at 3pm October 28th and remain closed through Wednesday, October 31. We hope to resume business Thursday morning, November 1….There will be NO PUBLIC TRANSPORT to and from IKEA Brooklyn after 7pm Sunday until further notice. Please check the MTA website for updates. Due to Hurricane Sandy there will be NO HOME DELIVERIES from Monday October 29th through Wednesday October 31st. In addition there will be NO WATER TAXI SERVICE to and from IKEA and Pier 11 in Manhattan from Sunday October 28th through Wednesday the October 31st.

The phone at Fairway seems to have been disconnected, so we’re assuming it’s also closed. Any Red Hook readers have reports?

Update: The Red Hook Fairway is apparently giving away it’s perishables. Have at ‘em!