05/13/15 9:56am

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Word on the street is that we’re more expensive than Manhattan (again). Well, I call shenanigans! I call bullshit. I call my mom and tell her that I’m doing well. This week’s apartments are damn affordable, and I haven’t heard of any living situations below Harlem with prices like these. So enjoy browsing these spots in Crown Heights, Ditmas Park, Sunset Park and Bushwick. And thank your lucky thighs it’s shorts season again, so you can curb-shop for furniture without freezing to death. (more…)

04/29/15 1:50pm

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Guys, I’m grumpy. I know it may seem out of character; after all, Brokelyn has long been known for its particular brand of naïveté and its irresistible joie de vivre. But today, finding cheap places to live was actually a nightmare. After fishing through listings for at least one whole Dandy Warhols album, we can certainly bring you places worth moving into in Crown Heights, Flatbush, Kensington, Bushwick and more. But be forewarned, the worst-season-to-move is imminent. The scarcity of this week’s listings is just the beginning! (more…)

04/15/15 10:31am

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Now that your taxes are done—and boy, we’re hoping you paid them—you can forget about “intangible properties” and start thinking about the ones you can touch, and smell, and sleep in. As per usual, cheap real estate options are eking ever so slightly farther out into the borough. But follow our example: we’re not going to start worrying until real estate actually pushes us off the edge of Sheepshead Bay and into the water. (more…)

04/01/15 9:54am

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If you’re lucky enough to have escaped the dreaded wintertime move, now is a great time to call it quits on the old place and sign a lease on a new one. The weather’s warmer, the days are longer and house-party season is heating up. Perfect time to warm a new house—if you’re a trained party host like some of our own, that is. This week’s apartments feature barf-friendly hardwood, cocktail-worthy kitchens and architecture that just screams “Let’s go to my bedroom and make out!” (more…)

03/18/15 1:28pm

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Don’t believe the hype: even though all humanity will one day be replaced by scores of condominia, we’ve still got plenty of time to enjoy prewar brownstones and stuff. In fact, we didn’t have any trouble this week picking out a number places you can brag about! You might not even want to leave your house to camp out at coffee shops, since now listings are pushing things like “free wi-fi” and floors that “cater to you.” Sounds like your apartment is more than meets the eye. Finger sandwiches, anyone? (more…)

03/04/15 1:54pm

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Okay, so you may be having some reservations about choosing a neighborhood to live in now that you know there’s a science to it. We get it! Moving isn’t just about the apartment; it’s also about everything that surrounds you when you step outside your front door. Well, most of this week’s apartments will surround you with either Crown Heights or Ditmas Park, as well as a couple spots in Sunset Park and Bed-Stuy. Everything’s three bedrooms or more, since the two-bedroom price creep has left us without anything we could viably call “cheap.” (more…)

01/21/15 1:04pm

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ICYMI on Brokelyn yesterday, renting an apartment ain’t always peaches & cream. That’s why you should at least be able to count on cheaper rent that’ll pad your bank account against the dollars you’re bound to lose on slummy landlords, not to mention late-night snacks. This week’s listings treat the borough top to bottom, with listings from Greenpoint to Bay Ridge. Incidentally, I also got a kick out of hiding names of Drake songs in here; see if you can differentiate his timeless titles from my own signature self-righteousness! (more…)

01/07/15 9:50am

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Happy 2015, y’all, and welcome back to the polar vortex. With the weather being what it is, and rent prices being what they are, there’s no use denying it: it’s time to start drinking. Wait, I mean thinking—about your next move, that is! Awkward segues aside, this week’s apartments are anything but cringeworthy. What they lack in amenities they make up for in a money ease. Okay, I know I said I was finished with awkward segues. But we found you a place that comes pre-furnished, so lay off. Everything’s business as usual cost-wise, with wallet-friendly rent prices that won’t make you regret all those dollars you spent over the holidays. On Flatbush! On Bed-Stuy! On Dyker and Ditmas! (more…)

12/17/14 9:56am

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Who has time to think about getting health insurance when you’ve got a life-changing New Years’ move to prepare for? Hey, relax: Brokelyn’s here to make it easy for ya. We did the dirty work of culling the market for the most reasonably-priced and desirably-situated spots in the borough. This week’s apartments remind you of how cheap and awesome the south-ier parts of Brooklyn are. Don’t worry, you can drink there, too. (more…)

12/03/14 12:46pm

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Happy December, guys. If you haven’t moved already, then you’d better do it quick before the temperatures reach full vortex. Also, trust me when I say that nothing sucks worse than dragging a bed-frame through the snow. So! This week’s apartments feature three-bedroom steals, two-bedrooms priced like one-bedrooms and general merriment to give you a little Christmas cheer about your real estate prospects.  (more…)